#1:
Master Sword: For the last time! I'm not your friend!.. I never even met you.
Saten: Sure we are. You invited me to your birthday.
Master Sword: No. You 'showed up' at my birthday.. I don't even know how you found my house.
#2:
Saten: (a year or two ago) Excuse me. I'm looking for the owner this business?
Girl: Wait though there (points at Master Swords office)
Saten: (starting going in).
Master Sword: (hiding behind wall) Come on. Come on.
Saten: (walks in) Excuse me I-
Sword: (tackles him and start violently beating him up)... (stops).. Sorry. (pants). I thought you were the mafia.
Saten: N -No I'm Saten Twist.
Sword: Who?
Saten: I've been asked to interview you.
Sword: Interview!?. (eyes narrow) Well. You can't interview a dead man now CAN YOU! (jumps out the four story window, and ends up going into ambulance, and he waves evily to Saten, as Saten watches him get lifted into the ambulance).
#3:
ron will: Welcome. To Iron wills show on being assertive.. Here's how being assertive works. You take down who's bigger then you.. Example. Who's the toughest pony in the crowd?
Sword: (there with Fluttershy) Well. I don't mean to toot my own horn, but I believe I hold the extinction o- (gets grabbed by Iron will and gets violently beaten up from off view).
Iron Will: Alright. Now who's the funniest?
Sword: I know my way around a jo- (starts getting beat up again).
Pony: For god sakes! Have some humility! It'll save your life!
#4:
Twilight: (sleeping soundly).. (she is suddenly awaken by a loud gunshot) WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT!? (runs done stairs, and suddenly gasps)..
Master Sword: (holding pistol, and Santa Clause is seen laying dead from a bullet though his head).. (groans). Before you start.
Twilight: Jesus christ!
Master Sword: (annoyedly) Okay! Before, you, start!
Twilight: HOLLY SHIT!
Master Sword: (annoyed) You gonna let me explain!?
Twilight: (angry) Yes Sword! I would love to know why you shot and killed, FATHER CHRISTMAS!
Master Sword: ... He startled me!
Twilight: (annoyed) HE STARTLED YOU!?
Master Sword: He! Startled me!
Twilight: (sarcastically) Oh, guess he should apologize than!
Master Sword: Well. That'll be kinda hard, cause.. I shot him..
#5: (related to 4)
Master Sword: Well. Looks like I better save Christmas..
Twilight: You can't be serious!?
Master Sword: I don't see any other opinion..
Twilight: ... You planned this, didn't you!?
Master sword: Whaaaaat!? No!
Twilight: You planned this! I know you did!
Master Sword: You honestly think I wou-
Spike: (comes out, in elf costume) Hey Sword. The sled is ready, an. (sees twilight). Uh oh..
(long pause).
Master Sword: You would not believe how cheap that elf costume was.
Twilight: (starts growling)
Master Sword: (happily) I stole it.
Twilight: SWOOO-
Master Sword: LET ME HAVE MY NIGHTMARE BEFORE CHRISTMAS MOMENT!
#6:
Saten walks back from train station.
Loud police voice: GET DOWN ON THE GROUND ASSHOLE! (Saten freaks out and hides on the ground surrendering) I'LL SHOOT YOUR LEGS OFF!!
Master Sword: (comes into view, driving police car). Hahaha! Gotcha.. Naw, it's just me
Saten: Sword? You scared th- Oh shit, did you steal cop car!?.. That's crazy!
Master Sword: No, what's crazy. Is leaving it unintended, anyone cold of stole it.. Prove.. I did!
Saten: But dude! You can't steal police cars! You know how illage that is!?
Master Sword: Pffffft, who will pull over a police car.
Saten: I- ... Wow., your actually right.
Master Sword: Have I ever NOT been right?
(shows an image of Saten about to be lite from a powerful cannon in a very dangerious and unprofessional way, and Master Sword giving him thumbs up, as it was Master Sword's idea).
#7:
Radio: Car 53, we're you heading in such a hurry?
Master Sword: Oh s*** that's us.. Uhhh... There's uh., bank robbery.
Radio: There's a bank robbery!?
Master Sword: Yes, we're.. We're heading their now! (turns on the Sirons and starts speeding).
Saten: Dude, we're are you going!?
Master Sword: Didn't you hear! Theirs a bank robbery!
Saten: What!? No theirs not-
Master Sword: PROTECT AND SERVE MOTHER FU-
SOON AFTER:
Suddenly the car Master Sword burst into the said bank.
Master Sword waved a loaded pistol around the bank.
Master Sword: YOUR BEING ROBBED! (Points gun at employee) WERE'S YOUR MONEY!
Employee: (crying) p, please don't kill me!
Master Sword: (dramatically) please don't MAKE ME!
(Sword and Saten arrive into the back of the bank)
Saten: Dude, what are you doing!?
Master Sword: No talk! We gotta take all this cash!
Saten: Soooo, nobody can steal it?
Master Sword: Uhh, yeah!
Saten: Hmmm, Good idea (starts grabbing money bags)
#8:
Sword: To prove my hatred of this place, I'm gonna leave a lousy tip...under fifteen percent!... And then I'll send my meal back, even though it's EXACTLY what I ordered!
#9:
Dr. Hooves: What's in it for me?
Master Sword: How about the glory of me not breaking your arm for your earlier statement.
Dr. Hooves: All I said was she looks a bit slu-
Master Sword: (holds Hoove's arm painfully).
Dr. Hooves: OKAY! OKAY!
#10:
Derpy: Thanks for another date.
Master Sword: Yes.. And I'm here to make it night your never forget.. (shoots pony dead for no apparent reason).
Derpy: ... Oh my.
Master Sword: (proudly) Yeah.
Master Sword: For the last time! I'm not your friend!.. I never even met you.
Saten: Sure we are. You invited me to your birthday.
Master Sword: No. You 'showed up' at my birthday.. I don't even know how you found my house.
#2:
Saten: (a year or two ago) Excuse me. I'm looking for the owner this business?
Girl: Wait though there (points at Master Swords office)
Saten: (starting going in).
Master Sword: (hiding behind wall) Come on. Come on.
Saten: (walks in) Excuse me I-
Sword: (tackles him and start violently beating him up)... (stops).. Sorry. (pants). I thought you were the mafia.
Saten: N -No I'm Saten Twist.
Sword: Who?
Saten: I've been asked to interview you.
Sword: Interview!?. (eyes narrow) Well. You can't interview a dead man now CAN YOU! (jumps out the four story window, and ends up going into ambulance, and he waves evily to Saten, as Saten watches him get lifted into the ambulance).
#3:
ron will: Welcome. To Iron wills show on being assertive.. Here's how being assertive works. You take down who's bigger then you.. Example. Who's the toughest pony in the crowd?
Sword: (there with Fluttershy) Well. I don't mean to toot my own horn, but I believe I hold the extinction o- (gets grabbed by Iron will and gets violently beaten up from off view).
Iron Will: Alright. Now who's the funniest?
Sword: I know my way around a jo- (starts getting beat up again).
Pony: For god sakes! Have some humility! It'll save your life!
#4:
Twilight: (sleeping soundly).. (she is suddenly awaken by a loud gunshot) WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT!? (runs done stairs, and suddenly gasps)..
Master Sword: (holding pistol, and Santa Clause is seen laying dead from a bullet though his head).. (groans). Before you start.
Twilight: Jesus christ!
Master Sword: (annoyedly) Okay! Before, you, start!
Twilight: HOLLY SHIT!
Master Sword: (annoyed) You gonna let me explain!?
Twilight: (angry) Yes Sword! I would love to know why you shot and killed, FATHER CHRISTMAS!
Master Sword: ... He startled me!
Twilight: (annoyed) HE STARTLED YOU!?
Master Sword: He! Startled me!
Twilight: (sarcastically) Oh, guess he should apologize than!
Master Sword: Well. That'll be kinda hard, cause.. I shot him..
#5: (related to 4)
Master Sword: Well. Looks like I better save Christmas..
Twilight: You can't be serious!?
Master Sword: I don't see any other opinion..
Twilight: ... You planned this, didn't you!?
Master sword: Whaaaaat!? No!
Twilight: You planned this! I know you did!
Master Sword: You honestly think I wou-
Spike: (comes out, in elf costume) Hey Sword. The sled is ready, an. (sees twilight). Uh oh..
(long pause).
Master Sword: You would not believe how cheap that elf costume was.
Twilight: (starts growling)
Master Sword: (happily) I stole it.
Twilight: SWOOO-
Master Sword: LET ME HAVE MY NIGHTMARE BEFORE CHRISTMAS MOMENT!
#6:
Saten walks back from train station.
Loud police voice: GET DOWN ON THE GROUND ASSHOLE! (Saten freaks out and hides on the ground surrendering) I'LL SHOOT YOUR LEGS OFF!!
Master Sword: (comes into view, driving police car). Hahaha! Gotcha.. Naw, it's just me
Saten: Sword? You scared th- Oh shit, did you steal cop car!?.. That's crazy!
Master Sword: No, what's crazy. Is leaving it unintended, anyone cold of stole it.. Prove.. I did!
Saten: But dude! You can't steal police cars! You know how illage that is!?
Master Sword: Pffffft, who will pull over a police car.
Saten: I- ... Wow., your actually right.
Master Sword: Have I ever NOT been right?
(shows an image of Saten about to be lite from a powerful cannon in a very dangerious and unprofessional way, and Master Sword giving him thumbs up, as it was Master Sword's idea).
#7:
Radio: Car 53, we're you heading in such a hurry?
Master Sword: Oh s*** that's us.. Uhhh... There's uh., bank robbery.
Radio: There's a bank robbery!?
Master Sword: Yes, we're.. We're heading their now! (turns on the Sirons and starts speeding).
Saten: Dude, we're are you going!?
Master Sword: Didn't you hear! Theirs a bank robbery!
Saten: What!? No theirs not-
Master Sword: PROTECT AND SERVE MOTHER FU-
SOON AFTER:
Suddenly the car Master Sword burst into the said bank.
Master Sword waved a loaded pistol around the bank.
Master Sword: YOUR BEING ROBBED! (Points gun at employee) WERE'S YOUR MONEY!
Employee: (crying) p, please don't kill me!
Master Sword: (dramatically) please don't MAKE ME!
(Sword and Saten arrive into the back of the bank)
Saten: Dude, what are you doing!?
Master Sword: No talk! We gotta take all this cash!
Saten: Soooo, nobody can steal it?
Master Sword: Uhh, yeah!
Saten: Hmmm, Good idea (starts grabbing money bags)
#8:
Sword: To prove my hatred of this place, I'm gonna leave a lousy tip...under fifteen percent!... And then I'll send my meal back, even though it's EXACTLY what I ordered!
#9:
Dr. Hooves: What's in it for me?
Master Sword: How about the glory of me not breaking your arm for your earlier statement.
Dr. Hooves: All I said was she looks a bit slu-
Master Sword: (holds Hoove's arm painfully).
Dr. Hooves: OKAY! OKAY!
#10:
Derpy: Thanks for another date.
Master Sword: Yes.. And I'm here to make it night your never forget.. (shoots pony dead for no apparent reason).
Derpy: ... Oh my.
Master Sword: (proudly) Yeah.