Aryn Awlson from Persona 4 - Aryn was just your typical kid with white hair at the age of 16. He loved Sword Art Online and had a collection of fake katanas. After his parents moved him to Buttfuck Nowhere, Japan (Or more commonly known as Inaba), he was forced to live with his greatest enemy, his bastard uncle, Dojima-san, and Nanako, the only true family Aryn had, as the rest had either abandoned him or was the drunken bastard Dojima. Regardless, Aryn continued on his way, until he soon gained a Persona, which was a totally-not-Stand. Aryn used this new found ability to make him an anime protagonist and maybe do some good for society like catch a killer while his uncle got drunk and fucked around. Aryn made allies with the Investigation Team in hopes of finding the killer, while at the same time, trying to decide if he wanted to be with Chie or Naoto more. In the end, he went with Chie, because her knee high attack boots really excited him (And distracted him in battle). After finding the killer (While secretly relishing in watching Dojima suffer physically and emotionally), he was finally allowed back to the big city, where he said good bye to his friends and Nanako and told Dojima to eat shit.
Kane, the Big Dick King from Dark Souls - Kane started out as a pathetic loser who was picked on every day by the bigger undead. Feeling that he would never get anywhere being the sad sack that he was, Kane made his way to Lordran in hopes of making a better life for himself. This resulted in his major quest of going across Lordran, making friends (Most of whom died tragically), making much more enemies (Preferably Lautrec), and getting wrecked over and over and over again. his biggest enemies include Lautrec, Patches the Liar, The Silver Anor Londo Brothers, the entire Clam race, and more. Kane was able to finally defeat the hollowed Gwyn with the help of his loyal comrade Solaire, and upon doing so, he left the First Flame to die out, so that he could become the ruler of Lordran, under the name Big Dick King, a title he earned after his journey.
Kristoff, the Descendant from Dark Souls 2 - The descendant of Kane, his legacy meant nothing in the land of Drangleic and he was forced to start his legacy over, as he planned to take the land and rule over it as the Big Dick Second Coming (Not spelled with a "U" because he has some standards). He witnessed less death than his ancestor had, but still experienced equal hatred for his enemies. Such enemies include Licia of Lindeldt, Nashandra, pretty much all rats, and more than Kristoff would like to admit. Finally able to defeat the Queen Bitch Nashandra, Kristoff took his place as the ruler of Drangleic, bringing honor to his families name and earning the title of Big Dick King. Unfortunately, this wouldn't last long, as he soon went to the Brume Tower, and has not been seen since.
Kael, The Bastard from Dark Souls 3 - Born from an elderly man and a young woman, Kael was born a bastard, so naturally, no one really wanted him. little is known of Kael. He has been known to have a companion named Sigmund of Catarina and due to his title of Bastard, he has brought shame to his family, despite not being his choice, and thus has lost the right to earn the name, Big Dick King, and instead, has been told to take the name The Bastard King.
Battle-Axe Torkus from Skyrim - A crazed Nord with a history of rabies. Born within the wild, Torkus has been forced to fight to survive ever since he was a child. He massacred his first bandit camp when he was only a toddler, as he ran in with a mace, killing every bandit inside, followed by teething on the very mace he used to kill his enemies. Once he grew up to be an adult, he begun to battle all of his enemies to the death, slaughtering them all, some times with his bare hands. He would always wear his massive iron helmet but would refuse to wear a shirt, which some may consider a terrible idea in the cold mountains of Skyrim, but due to a thick coat of chest hair, Torkus has managed to survive the cold for years. He has managed to half the entire population of Skyrim's wildlife, dragon's included. His final act of warfare was during a fight against one hundred soldiers. He was able to slaughter every last one of them as he was stabbed violently with their blades. He was found days later, dead, a dozen swords shoved into his body, surrounded by the corpses of one hundred enemies.
Orlando from Skyrim - A Redguard who has a history of black magic, he soon gave up the magical arts in turn for the massive Ebony Sword. He used the very katana-styled sword to hunt down vampires in Skyrim, before succumbing to the vampire disease himself. He soon joined the Dawnguard as a vampire to help hunt down any remaining vampires, basically becoming the Elder Scrolls equivalent of Blade. Though he went though much segregation due to being different than those in Skyrim (Also getting hate for being a vampire) he decided to cherish his vampire self. He would later go on to join the Companions and become a werewolf, as being a vampire was fucking terrible
Ballin' Stalin from Animal Crossing: New Leaf - Wearing nothing but a blue suit and hat and a fancy jester mask, Ballin' Stalin came to Animal Town (Later renamed Neo-Metro) hoping to get away from the busy life of his awful family and friends. However, Ballin' ended up getting more, as the second he walked into town, he was given the role as mayor of the town. Fascinated with the possibilities, Ballin' used this to his advantage, as he began to build a massive empire with the labor of random animals that only asked for his communication from time to time about the weather or gold nuggets. Ballin' had soon gone from mayor to a ruthless dictator that ruled with an iron fist and attended birthday parties. Life wasn't completely easy, as he had to suffer with the awful Sparro, his arch enemy, who later pushed Ballin' to attempt to axe-murder Sparro in the street, which he failed to do. The shame and anger has caused Ballin' to go into hiding, and he hasn't come out of his hiding spot since.
Toledo Tim from Fallout 3 - Toledo Tim started out his days inside a Vault, where he would get shit from the adults and get his ass kicked daily by the Tunnel Snakes. Things changed when he was able to leave the Vault, despite leaving it to fall into chaos and possibly killing everyone. Due to a shit childhood, Toledo Tim soon grew up to become a rather disturbed individual. He began his life of insanity by gunning down a stranger due to him wanting his fresh water. After this, Toledo Tim grew to start eating human flesh and collecting guns that he would never need but felt safer to have on hand. He also grew to enjoy the company of dogs and developed an extreme Nuka-Cola addiction. After he did find his dad, the reunion didn't last long, as Colonel Autumn killed him. Now losing the only person that Toledo Tim cared about almost as much as Dogmeat, he did everything he could to completely fuck over the Enclave and Colonel Autumn before he finally gunned him down in cold blood, even though he convinced him to step down. Not done yet, Toledo Tim went to the Enclave HQ and destroyed the entire place, all for the joy of spitting Autumn, even beyond the grave. Toledo Tim would later go on to murder those who wrong people, and eat their flesh. He is currently making a trail of dead Slavers on his way to Paradise Falls, with people calling him "The swellest cannibal in the Wasteland".
Knee Scrape Nikki from Tony Hawk's Underground - Raised in Dumpster, New Jersey, Nikki started her days as a skater, breaking all of her bones and the bones of the homeless men as she crashed into them. She was soon able to make a name for herself, even though Eric Sparrow the parasite did his best to leech off of Nikki's success in an attempt to make it big. Regardless, the two went across the world with Tony Hawk and Bam Margera before his life went to shit, exploring the many corners of the world, from the dirty crocodile-filled strip clubs of Tampa, Florida to the after-salt politics from the Cold War of Moscow, Russia, Nikki was able to make a name for herself, before Eric took that fame and destroyed it, becoming a pro skater instead of Nikki. Nikki was given a fate worse than death after that: Left by her team to rot in Russia. Thankfully, Nikki was able to escape. After starting a revolution by destroying the media and helping out members of the Russian Mafia, Nikki was able to make enough money to make it back to Dumpster, New Jersey, where she, along with Tony Hawk, Bam Margera, Chad Muska, Mike Vallely, and Bucky Lasek, they joined the Band of the Tony Hawk and finally brought back the soul of skating, and not the money (The money was good, too, though). Later, Nikki violently punched Sparrow hard in the face, something that everyone in the world was fine with.
Hot Cocoa from Saints Row - Hot Cocoa is a man of unknown origins. His name, birthplace, and family, is all unknown. All we know is that he is a man of Spanish heritage and of extreme body mass. He started as a street urchin in the shit hole of Stillwater, playing acoustic guitar in hopes that his voice and good looks would get him by. He would later go on to join a street gain, his muscles being a great asset to the Third Street Saints. After killing drug dealers, street racers, and record producers, Hot Cocoa felt like he had everything, until he blew up on a boat. He later woke up after years in a coma, sexier than ever. Becoming the boss of the Third Street Saints, he murdered his way through tattooed brutes, voodoo druggies, and motorcycle samurais. After taking over Stillwater, he wasn't satisfied, and made his way to Steelport (By force), and killed a prostitution ring, British hackers, and luchadores. Still unsatisfied, Hot Cocoa decided to become the President of the United States, shortly before it was blown up by aliens. After killing his way through the alien scum with the help of Keith David and others, he killed the alien leader, and is presumed to have gone to take over the galaxy and time itself. It is unknown if Hot Cocoa was finally satisfied or not .
Lil' Beck from Fable 2 - Lil' Beck started out as a homeless little child with his sister Rose and dog that he named Danny, a name of a dog that could never die. After meeting with the old asshole Lucien, Beck saw as his sister was gunned down and was nearly murdered by Lucien himself. After this, Beck swore to get revenge as soon as possible, thus he waited ten years before he did so. Now that he didn't have a bullet wound in his chest, he was prepared to go and kill Lucien. With the help of Hannah the pacifist monk except when she isn't a pacifist, Garth the African American Wizard, and Reaver the Dick, Beck was ready to fight Lucien. Along his journey, Beck met a travelling girl named Becky, who was scared of many things, but Beck found very adorable, and soon married Becky. Despite this, Lucien had decided to use this against Beck, and after taking Hannah, Garth, and the Dick hostage, Lucien shot and killed Danny, and told Beck that he murdered Becky just to piss him off. It worked. Beck came up to Lucien's Spire, where he gunned him down, in a very disappointing way, but killing him regardless. After doing so, Beck decided to buy Lucien's castle, where he rubbed his junk on all of Lucien's things and set fire his family painting in the hopes it would make Lucien's dead family burn in hell. After buying the castle and becoming king, Beck brought forth a golden age of manufacturing and economy, before completely destroying the economy and creating a Great Depression. People were torn on overthrowing him, as though he did overtax like crazy, he was a real fun guy at the local parties. Beck eventually died when Fable 3 came along in order to make way for his equally as unfortunate by not as interesting son.
Good Ol' Brick from Fable 3 - Brick was known as the kindest of Beck's two sons, though far from the brightest. This can be apparent from his extreme, almost romantic, relationship with his pet dog, Danny II, this one actually not dying like the last one. For whatever reason, Brick was lucky enough to have a girlfriend even before the events, and although having just been introduced to the story and not having much character in that time, Brick still felt bad when he was forced to have her perish to save the protesters, as ordered by his brother, Logan, his very own Dio Brando. Brick, with the help of friendly old man Walter, began to go on a journey across the country to save the people. As Brick watched the world filled with murder and depression, he began to lose his good boy attitude, and soon became a mask wearing edge lord, even growing some brain cells along the way. After finally overthrowing Logan, he ordered him to be gunned down in the streets by riflemen, much to the joy of the people. Brick began to create a world of prosperity in order to fix his brothers mistakes. Little did Brick know that the Darkness, some generic evil entity, had come and, since Brick spent all of the kingdoms fortune on fixing the country, the military was practically useless, killing everyone and leaving Brick alone with Danny II, and nothing else. Truly a tragic end to a mediocre story.
Chumbawamba from Resident Evil - Nicknamed after the band for getting knocked down (Usually by a bullet), but gets back up again. Starting out as a simple zombie just outside the save room, Nik's friend Ryan felt it would be best to kill him, to save the trouble. Being Ryan's first time, he was unaware of them coming back, and ignored the body afterward. After this, Chumbawamba came back, faster, stronger, and pissed the fuck off at Ryan in particular for shooting him. Every time Ryan would come into this room, he would be completely unprepared for Chumbawamba, with low ammo and just had to make a break for it to the save room each time. Ryan had a total of four close calls with Chumbawamba before finally putting him down with a shotgun, ending the nightmare within the nightmare.
Rolling Thunder from Saints Row 2 - Hot Cocoa had met Rolling Thunder by chance. Due to keeping his Xbox Live on at all times, Hot Cocoa was soon able to come across Rolling Thunder at random in the city of Stillwater. Rolling Thunder appeared as a muscular African American with a sleeveless black T-shirt, baggy jeans, a bald head, goatee, and a massive riot gun in his hand. Hot Cocoa and Rolling Thunder exchanged no words with each other. The two buff men seemed to have a sort of understanding for each other, and didn't need to speak. The two decided to team up, and began to violently attack the tattooed gang, blowing up their boats and planes, and slaughtering hundreds. After the bloodbath, Rolling Thunder suddenly vanished, but not before badly crippling the tattooed gang and giving Hot Cocoa the upper hand. It is said that Rolling Thunder came from a rip in his world, an alternate universe to Hot Cocoa's universe where Rolling Thunder is actually the boss of the Third Street Saints, a choice Hot Cocoa would be fine with. It is unknown if the universe that Hot Cocoa is a part of is the base universe or part of many universes made by choices in the base universe. Regardless, Rolling Thunder has proved himself to be a trustworthy and loyal ally to Hot Cocoa
Kane, the Big Dick King from Dark Souls - Kane started out as a pathetic loser who was picked on every day by the bigger undead. Feeling that he would never get anywhere being the sad sack that he was, Kane made his way to Lordran in hopes of making a better life for himself. This resulted in his major quest of going across Lordran, making friends (Most of whom died tragically), making much more enemies (Preferably Lautrec), and getting wrecked over and over and over again. his biggest enemies include Lautrec, Patches the Liar, The Silver Anor Londo Brothers, the entire Clam race, and more. Kane was able to finally defeat the hollowed Gwyn with the help of his loyal comrade Solaire, and upon doing so, he left the First Flame to die out, so that he could become the ruler of Lordran, under the name Big Dick King, a title he earned after his journey.
Kristoff, the Descendant from Dark Souls 2 - The descendant of Kane, his legacy meant nothing in the land of Drangleic and he was forced to start his legacy over, as he planned to take the land and rule over it as the Big Dick Second Coming (Not spelled with a "U" because he has some standards). He witnessed less death than his ancestor had, but still experienced equal hatred for his enemies. Such enemies include Licia of Lindeldt, Nashandra, pretty much all rats, and more than Kristoff would like to admit. Finally able to defeat the Queen Bitch Nashandra, Kristoff took his place as the ruler of Drangleic, bringing honor to his families name and earning the title of Big Dick King. Unfortunately, this wouldn't last long, as he soon went to the Brume Tower, and has not been seen since.
Kael, The Bastard from Dark Souls 3 - Born from an elderly man and a young woman, Kael was born a bastard, so naturally, no one really wanted him. little is known of Kael. He has been known to have a companion named Sigmund of Catarina and due to his title of Bastard, he has brought shame to his family, despite not being his choice, and thus has lost the right to earn the name, Big Dick King, and instead, has been told to take the name The Bastard King.
Battle-Axe Torkus from Skyrim - A crazed Nord with a history of rabies. Born within the wild, Torkus has been forced to fight to survive ever since he was a child. He massacred his first bandit camp when he was only a toddler, as he ran in with a mace, killing every bandit inside, followed by teething on the very mace he used to kill his enemies. Once he grew up to be an adult, he begun to battle all of his enemies to the death, slaughtering them all, some times with his bare hands. He would always wear his massive iron helmet but would refuse to wear a shirt, which some may consider a terrible idea in the cold mountains of Skyrim, but due to a thick coat of chest hair, Torkus has managed to survive the cold for years. He has managed to half the entire population of Skyrim's wildlife, dragon's included. His final act of warfare was during a fight against one hundred soldiers. He was able to slaughter every last one of them as he was stabbed violently with their blades. He was found days later, dead, a dozen swords shoved into his body, surrounded by the corpses of one hundred enemies.
Orlando from Skyrim - A Redguard who has a history of black magic, he soon gave up the magical arts in turn for the massive Ebony Sword. He used the very katana-styled sword to hunt down vampires in Skyrim, before succumbing to the vampire disease himself. He soon joined the Dawnguard as a vampire to help hunt down any remaining vampires, basically becoming the Elder Scrolls equivalent of Blade. Though he went though much segregation due to being different than those in Skyrim (Also getting hate for being a vampire) he decided to cherish his vampire self. He would later go on to join the Companions and become a werewolf, as being a vampire was fucking terrible
Ballin' Stalin from Animal Crossing: New Leaf - Wearing nothing but a blue suit and hat and a fancy jester mask, Ballin' Stalin came to Animal Town (Later renamed Neo-Metro) hoping to get away from the busy life of his awful family and friends. However, Ballin' ended up getting more, as the second he walked into town, he was given the role as mayor of the town. Fascinated with the possibilities, Ballin' used this to his advantage, as he began to build a massive empire with the labor of random animals that only asked for his communication from time to time about the weather or gold nuggets. Ballin' had soon gone from mayor to a ruthless dictator that ruled with an iron fist and attended birthday parties. Life wasn't completely easy, as he had to suffer with the awful Sparro, his arch enemy, who later pushed Ballin' to attempt to axe-murder Sparro in the street, which he failed to do. The shame and anger has caused Ballin' to go into hiding, and he hasn't come out of his hiding spot since.
Toledo Tim from Fallout 3 - Toledo Tim started out his days inside a Vault, where he would get shit from the adults and get his ass kicked daily by the Tunnel Snakes. Things changed when he was able to leave the Vault, despite leaving it to fall into chaos and possibly killing everyone. Due to a shit childhood, Toledo Tim soon grew up to become a rather disturbed individual. He began his life of insanity by gunning down a stranger due to him wanting his fresh water. After this, Toledo Tim grew to start eating human flesh and collecting guns that he would never need but felt safer to have on hand. He also grew to enjoy the company of dogs and developed an extreme Nuka-Cola addiction. After he did find his dad, the reunion didn't last long, as Colonel Autumn killed him. Now losing the only person that Toledo Tim cared about almost as much as Dogmeat, he did everything he could to completely fuck over the Enclave and Colonel Autumn before he finally gunned him down in cold blood, even though he convinced him to step down. Not done yet, Toledo Tim went to the Enclave HQ and destroyed the entire place, all for the joy of spitting Autumn, even beyond the grave. Toledo Tim would later go on to murder those who wrong people, and eat their flesh. He is currently making a trail of dead Slavers on his way to Paradise Falls, with people calling him "The swellest cannibal in the Wasteland".
Knee Scrape Nikki from Tony Hawk's Underground - Raised in Dumpster, New Jersey, Nikki started her days as a skater, breaking all of her bones and the bones of the homeless men as she crashed into them. She was soon able to make a name for herself, even though Eric Sparrow the parasite did his best to leech off of Nikki's success in an attempt to make it big. Regardless, the two went across the world with Tony Hawk and Bam Margera before his life went to shit, exploring the many corners of the world, from the dirty crocodile-filled strip clubs of Tampa, Florida to the after-salt politics from the Cold War of Moscow, Russia, Nikki was able to make a name for herself, before Eric took that fame and destroyed it, becoming a pro skater instead of Nikki. Nikki was given a fate worse than death after that: Left by her team to rot in Russia. Thankfully, Nikki was able to escape. After starting a revolution by destroying the media and helping out members of the Russian Mafia, Nikki was able to make enough money to make it back to Dumpster, New Jersey, where she, along with Tony Hawk, Bam Margera, Chad Muska, Mike Vallely, and Bucky Lasek, they joined the Band of the Tony Hawk and finally brought back the soul of skating, and not the money (The money was good, too, though). Later, Nikki violently punched Sparrow hard in the face, something that everyone in the world was fine with.
Hot Cocoa from Saints Row - Hot Cocoa is a man of unknown origins. His name, birthplace, and family, is all unknown. All we know is that he is a man of Spanish heritage and of extreme body mass. He started as a street urchin in the shit hole of Stillwater, playing acoustic guitar in hopes that his voice and good looks would get him by. He would later go on to join a street gain, his muscles being a great asset to the Third Street Saints. After killing drug dealers, street racers, and record producers, Hot Cocoa felt like he had everything, until he blew up on a boat. He later woke up after years in a coma, sexier than ever. Becoming the boss of the Third Street Saints, he murdered his way through tattooed brutes, voodoo druggies, and motorcycle samurais. After taking over Stillwater, he wasn't satisfied, and made his way to Steelport (By force), and killed a prostitution ring, British hackers, and luchadores. Still unsatisfied, Hot Cocoa decided to become the President of the United States, shortly before it was blown up by aliens. After killing his way through the alien scum with the help of Keith David and others, he killed the alien leader, and is presumed to have gone to take over the galaxy and time itself. It is unknown if Hot Cocoa was finally satisfied or not .
Lil' Beck from Fable 2 - Lil' Beck started out as a homeless little child with his sister Rose and dog that he named Danny, a name of a dog that could never die. After meeting with the old asshole Lucien, Beck saw as his sister was gunned down and was nearly murdered by Lucien himself. After this, Beck swore to get revenge as soon as possible, thus he waited ten years before he did so. Now that he didn't have a bullet wound in his chest, he was prepared to go and kill Lucien. With the help of Hannah the pacifist monk except when she isn't a pacifist, Garth the African American Wizard, and Reaver the Dick, Beck was ready to fight Lucien. Along his journey, Beck met a travelling girl named Becky, who was scared of many things, but Beck found very adorable, and soon married Becky. Despite this, Lucien had decided to use this against Beck, and after taking Hannah, Garth, and the Dick hostage, Lucien shot and killed Danny, and told Beck that he murdered Becky just to piss him off. It worked. Beck came up to Lucien's Spire, where he gunned him down, in a very disappointing way, but killing him regardless. After doing so, Beck decided to buy Lucien's castle, where he rubbed his junk on all of Lucien's things and set fire his family painting in the hopes it would make Lucien's dead family burn in hell. After buying the castle and becoming king, Beck brought forth a golden age of manufacturing and economy, before completely destroying the economy and creating a Great Depression. People were torn on overthrowing him, as though he did overtax like crazy, he was a real fun guy at the local parties. Beck eventually died when Fable 3 came along in order to make way for his equally as unfortunate by not as interesting son.
Good Ol' Brick from Fable 3 - Brick was known as the kindest of Beck's two sons, though far from the brightest. This can be apparent from his extreme, almost romantic, relationship with his pet dog, Danny II, this one actually not dying like the last one. For whatever reason, Brick was lucky enough to have a girlfriend even before the events, and although having just been introduced to the story and not having much character in that time, Brick still felt bad when he was forced to have her perish to save the protesters, as ordered by his brother, Logan, his very own Dio Brando. Brick, with the help of friendly old man Walter, began to go on a journey across the country to save the people. As Brick watched the world filled with murder and depression, he began to lose his good boy attitude, and soon became a mask wearing edge lord, even growing some brain cells along the way. After finally overthrowing Logan, he ordered him to be gunned down in the streets by riflemen, much to the joy of the people. Brick began to create a world of prosperity in order to fix his brothers mistakes. Little did Brick know that the Darkness, some generic evil entity, had come and, since Brick spent all of the kingdoms fortune on fixing the country, the military was practically useless, killing everyone and leaving Brick alone with Danny II, and nothing else. Truly a tragic end to a mediocre story.
Chumbawamba from Resident Evil - Nicknamed after the band for getting knocked down (Usually by a bullet), but gets back up again. Starting out as a simple zombie just outside the save room, Nik's friend Ryan felt it would be best to kill him, to save the trouble. Being Ryan's first time, he was unaware of them coming back, and ignored the body afterward. After this, Chumbawamba came back, faster, stronger, and pissed the fuck off at Ryan in particular for shooting him. Every time Ryan would come into this room, he would be completely unprepared for Chumbawamba, with low ammo and just had to make a break for it to the save room each time. Ryan had a total of four close calls with Chumbawamba before finally putting him down with a shotgun, ending the nightmare within the nightmare.
Rolling Thunder from Saints Row 2 - Hot Cocoa had met Rolling Thunder by chance. Due to keeping his Xbox Live on at all times, Hot Cocoa was soon able to come across Rolling Thunder at random in the city of Stillwater. Rolling Thunder appeared as a muscular African American with a sleeveless black T-shirt, baggy jeans, a bald head, goatee, and a massive riot gun in his hand. Hot Cocoa and Rolling Thunder exchanged no words with each other. The two buff men seemed to have a sort of understanding for each other, and didn't need to speak. The two decided to team up, and began to violently attack the tattooed gang, blowing up their boats and planes, and slaughtering hundreds. After the bloodbath, Rolling Thunder suddenly vanished, but not before badly crippling the tattooed gang and giving Hot Cocoa the upper hand. It is said that Rolling Thunder came from a rip in his world, an alternate universe to Hot Cocoa's universe where Rolling Thunder is actually the boss of the Third Street Saints, a choice Hot Cocoa would be fine with. It is unknown if the universe that Hot Cocoa is a part of is the base universe or part of many universes made by choices in the base universe. Regardless, Rolling Thunder has proved himself to be a trustworthy and loyal ally to Hot Cocoa