Song: link
Sean: *Looks at a grey hedgehog who looks just like him* Your name wouldn't happen to be Sean too, would it?
Sean The Hedgehog: It is. What a pleasure to meet you. I'll be back, I gotta insult Saten Twist, because he's playing as Alex Trebek.
Gordon: *Standing near a yard tower*
Hawkeye: What are you doing?
Gordon: Waiting.
Hawkeye: For what?
Gordon: *Gets hit a 2 ton bag of salt* Wrong pony!!!!
Rainbow Dash: Sorry!
Double Scoop: Welcome back to the S.S.S.S. Our final two shows for the day are...
Gran Turismo - Rated TV-PG
My Little Pornstar - Rated TV-MA for Mature Audiences
Double Scoop: It's action mixed in with comedy.
What to expect in this week's episode.
Tim: You're splitting us up?
Captain Jefferson: Just until Saturday. Someone's gotta teach the new guys what to do.
---
Pony: *Driving a sports car* Turn on the nitrous.
Pony 2: *Turns on the nitrous*
Pony: *Going faster*
---
Captain Jefferson: These two guys are wanted by the State Troopers, both in this state, and in Pennsylvania.
Tim: *Driving after the bad guys*
Captain Jefferson: We gotta be on our game.
Tim: *Hits another car, and goes on two wheels*
Song: link
Julia: *Driving her police car on the round freeway*
Tim: *Sitting next to her*
Gran Turismo
Starring Larry Wilcox as Tim Miller
Rainbow Dash as Julia Rose
Tim: *Talks on the radio*
Julia: *Increases speed in the car while turning on the police lights*
Also starring Sean Jefferson from SeanTheHedgehog
Toby Linnehan from SeanTheHedgehog
And Red Velvet from Dragonaura15
Tim & Julia: *Walking out of the barracks, and to their police car*
Episode 2: Flying From Town To Town
Special Guest Stars, Bartholomew Perfect the 55th from SeanTheHedgehog
And Rick Jones from SeanTheHedgehog
Tim: I'm still mad at you for lying about that chase.
Julia: What are you talking about?
Tim: You told the Captain I was driving when our suspect crashed into that garbage truck.
Julia: If you're mad about it, why don't you stop working with me then?
Tim: It's not that serious.
Captain Jefferson: *Arrives* Oh good, you two haven't left yet.
Julia: How come?
Captain Jefferson: You two will stop working together for a while.
Tim, and Julia stared at each other. They weren't expecting the Captain to mention something they were talking about earlier.
Captain Jefferson: Two new recruits just arrived, a little later than scheduled. You're going to work with them for a while.
Tim: You're splitting us up?
Captain Jefferson: Just until Saturday. Someone's gotta teach the new guys what to do.
Julia: Where are they?
They spotted the new ponies coming outside of the barracks, and walking towards them.
Captain Jefferson: I'd like you two to meet Toby Linnehan, and Red Velvet.
Toby: Hi.
Red: Pleasure to meet you.
Tim: Likewise.
Captain Jefferson: Red, you're working with Julia. Tim, you take Toby around town in one of our Caprices.
Tim: Yes sir. *Walks with Toby to a police car*
Red: Would you like me to drive?
Julia: Sure.
Meanwhile, Toby was thinking about Julia.
Toby: That blue pegasus is smoking hot.
Tim: Yeah, well keep your mind on the radio. *Gets into the driver's seat*
Toby: Alright. *Sits down next to Tim*
Tim: *Drives out of the parking lot, and turns left. He drives towards the docks*
Red: *Driving the M4 to the road*
Julia: Turn right.
Red: *Turns right* So how long have you known Tim?
Julia: Since yesterday.
Red: Do you know if he's single?
Julia: With good looks like that, I doubt it.
Red: *Looks at Julia* I want him to be mine.
Julia: Keep your eyes on the road.
Red: *Looks at the road while she drives*
Julia: We're not allowed to date anyone that we work with.
Red: *Her smile disappears*
Red was driving the police car with Julia sitting next to her.
Red: *Turns right, and crosses the railroad tracks. Then she drives under the highway*
Mare: *Running towards them*
Julia: Pull over, and let's see what she wants.
Red: *Pulls over behind a FedEx van*
Mare: You two officers gotta help me. An orange unicorn stole my Porsche.
Song: link
Tim: *Driving northbound passing a police station, and a hospital*
Dispatch: GT12, be on the lookout for a stolen vehicle. Your target is a Porsche 918 Spyder.
A picture of the car appeared on Tim's front window
Toby: GT12, responding.
Tim: *Turns on the siren, and lights*
In front of them was an intersection. They saw Red, and Julia chasing the Porsche, going to the right.
Tim: *Speeds up, and turns right*
Ponies: *Dealing with a car accident*
The Porsche turned left, and was heading for the Round Freeway. He took another left, and was heading the wrong way.
Julia: *On the radio* He's going against the traffic!
Tim: This guy has to be stopped now.
Red: *Catching up to the Porsche*
Ponies: *Steering out of the way*
Red: *Taps it*
The Porsche spun out of control. Stop the song.
Julia: Suspect has spun out.
Red: *Stops behind the Porsche*
Tim: *Gets in front of the Porsche*
In the car was Bartholomew Perfect The 55th.
Bartholomew: *Gets out* Well, this certainly could have gone better.
Toby: *Gets out* Place your hooves on your head. *Arresting Bartholomew* You're under arrest for Grand Theft.
Bartholomew: Spare me the details.
Toby: You know you could have killed someone going the wrong way? Get in. *Opens the back door*
Bartholomew: *Gets inside the car*
Toby: *Sits next to Tim*
Tim: They trained you well. *Turns the car around, and goes off the freeway*
Red: *Follows Tim*
Tim, and Julia met up in the parking lot near their station after their shift ended.
Tim: You wanted to see me?
Julia: I need a ride to Local Consideration.
Tim: Okay. *Walks with Julia to his Viper*
Halfway to Local Consideration, Julia decided to talk to Tim.
Julia: Do you enjoy working with Toby?
Tim: Sure. How's Red treating you?
Julia: She has a crush on you.
Tim: I see.
Julia: What do you think about Toby?
Tim: He thinks you're smoking hot.
Julia: These new guys both have a crush on us.
Tim: I know how to get Red away from me, but I'm not sure how to stop Toby.
Julia: I know someone that'll love dating Toby.
Tim: *Turns left, and passes a Fire Department, and a hospital* I bet she has curves just like yours.
Julia: Oh stop it. *Playfully hits Tim's shoulder while laughing*
Tim: Here we are. *Stops at Local Consideration*
Julia: Don't go anywhere yet. Stay here until I come out.
Tim: Okay.
Julia: *Gets out of the car, and walks to the shop*
Tim: *Sticks his head out of the window* What do you have planned?
Julia: It's a surprise.
Tim: *Waits*
A few seconds later, a loud engine could be heard inside the shop.
Tim: What is she-
Julia: *Does a burnout on her motorcycle, then stops to the left of Tim's Viper* I just got new tires! What do you think?
Tim: They're nice. They look like tires that have a lot of grip.
Julia: See you tomorrow Tim. *Rides off on her motorcycle*
Tim: *Drives off in his Viper*
It started to get dark, as Tim stopped at a friend's house.
Tim: *Knocks on the door four times*
Rick: *Opens the door, and is excited when he sees who is at the front door* Tim Miller! I haven't seen you in a month.
Tim: Yeah, it's been a long time. Hasn't it?
Rick: Come on in.
Tim: Don't mind if I do. *Walks in*
They sat down at a table. Rick got himself, and Tim a can of 7-Up.
Rick: *Opens his can* So, how's the Police Department treating you? *Drinking his soda*
Tim: Fine. That's actually why I came to see you.
Rick: Why? What's up?
Tim: *Opens his can, and takes a small sip* There's this mare that joined us. She seems to be attracted to me, but we're not allowed to date other officers.
Rick: Right. Why are you telling me this?
Tim: You said you wanted a mare to date, and I think she'd be good for you.
Rick: Well, if you say so. How are you going to introduce me?
Tim: Come down to the station as soon as you can, and ask to see me, and Red Velvet. I'll handle everything else once we come to see you.
Rick: I got it. Thanks Tim.
Tim: No problem man. Cheers.
They tapped their soda cans together, and drank what was left inside of it.
Next morning, Captain Jefferson was talking to his officers in the briefing room.
Captain Jefferson: We're getting reports from the State Troopers of two ponies killing officers for fun. They're currently in Ponyville, but they think the suspects might come towards us. These two guys are wanted by the State Troopers, both in this state, and in Pennsylvania. If they do show up here, we need to stop them quickly, before anypony gets hurt. We gotta be on our game.
Officers: Yes sir.
Captain Jefferson: That's what I like to hear. Get out there.
Officers: *Leaving*
Julia: Okay Red, it's your turn to operate the radio.
Red: Alright.
Tim: And it's your turn to drive.
Toby: Sweet.
But Toby was not good at driving, and Red wasn't good with operating a radio.
Song: link
Red: *Talking on the radio, but can't remember what street she's on*
Toby: *Driving after a stolen van, but crashes into a street lamp*
Red: *Talking on the radio, but drops the receiver*
Julia: *Shakes her head in annoyance*
Tim: *Pointing to a bank robber*
Toby: *Shoots at the bank robber, but shoots two pedestrians instead*
Tim: *Takes the gun out of Toby's hooves*
Toby: *Driving after a suspect behind Julia, but hits her car*
Julia: *Spins out of control*
Toby: *Stops the car*
Tim: What the hell did you stop for?
Toby: To see if Julia's okay.
Tim: She's fine, but you're not supposed to stop for anything when chasing a suspect.
Toby: Other police departments do that.
Tim: Not us. *Sighs* I don't think you have what it takes to drive a car.
Julia: You don't have what it takes to operate a radio.
Red: *Covers her head in shame* I'm sorry.
Julia: *Worried* Wait, don't take it so hard. I'm sorry. You will get better at it, but we neeed some more training.
Red: *Looks up at Julia* Okay.
The next day was Saturday. Captain Jefferson talked to Julia, and Tim in his office.
Captain Jefferson: So, how did everything go with Toby, and Red?
Tim: Okay. Just don't let Toby drive anytime soon.
Julia: Red needs more training with operating a radio.
Captain Jefferson: Okay. Everything else went fine though. Right?
Tim: Yes sir.
Mare: *Arrives* Tim Miller?
Tim: Yes?
Mare: A friend of yours named Rick Jones is here to see you, and Red Velvet.
Tim: Perfect. Excuse me. *Goes to talk to Rick*
He arrived the same time Red did.
Red: *Spots Tim* Hey sexy.
Tim: Red, we need to talk.
Red: Anything for you.
Tim: You know we're not allowed to date, right?
Red: What are you talking about?
Tim: We work together. Officers in the same department are not allowed to date each other.
Red: Bummer.
Tim: However, there is a pony I'd like you to meet. Rick Jones.
Rick: Hi. Tim told me all about you.
Red: And you look sexier than him.
Tim: *Laughs* Okay, you two get yourself acquainted, and I'll see you later.
That night, Rick took Red out to dinner.
Red: You're such a gentlecolt. I like that.
Rick: And you will like this place. I got us reservations at the most expensive restaurant this town has to offer. *Stops the car*
An Acura was speeding down the road.
Rick: *Crossing the street with Red*
Acura Pony: *Honks his horn, and hits the brakes. He hits Red*
Red: *Flies into the back windshield of an Explorer*
Acura Pony: Oh my goodness. *Gets out*
Rick: Red, are you okay?
Red: *Gets out her police badge*
Acura Pony: i hit a cop.
Police Pony: *Stops in a Nissan Skyline police car* GT3, I got a pony with a red Acura who hit a pedestrian. Send over an ambulance, and a Caprice.
Dispatch: Ten-4 GT3.
Red was taken into the hospital to be treated. X rays were taken of her bones, and only her back legs were broken.
Rick: I'm sorry this happened.
Red: It's not your fault.
Tim: The stallion who ran you over has been arrested. He turned himself in.
Red: When do I get back to work?
Tim: Soon. The Captain will talk to you about that.
Two days later, Red returned to work with Toby. She couldn't drive, so she had to work the radio, while Toby would do the driving.
Tim: *Driving the police car*
Julia: It feels great to be back in the M4.
Tim: I'll say.
Dispatch: Attention all units, an important message from Captain Jefferson.
Captain Jefferson: The cop killers have finally entered Gran Turismo. They just entered our town heading southbound. Your target is a black Camaro.
A picture of the car appeared on the front window
Song: link
Tim: *Turns right. He's on the road that the suspects are on, heading towards them*
Julia: Are you thinking what I'm thinking?
Tim: We block the road as soon as we spot our suspect.
Bad Ponies: *Passing a railroad crossing*
Tim: There they are. *Brakes, and slides the car sideways to block the road*
Bad Ponies: *Driving on the sidewalk to avoid Tim*
Tim: *Backs up, and turns left*
Bad Ponies: *Making a left turn*
Tim: *Driving after the bad ponies*
Julia: GT24, we spotted the suspects on Helsun Boulevard.
Red: GT12, westbound on Green Drive. Do you need backup?
Tim: No.
Julia: Negative. We're fine for now. We'll call you when we need backup.
Bad Pony 1: *Driving fast, and turns right after passing a police station*
Bad Pony 2: You ever been in this city before?
Bad Pony 1: No.
Bad Pony 2: Well I have. Make a left.
Bad Pony 1: *Turns left, and goes over a bridge crossing a river*
Tim: He's heading for the freeway.
Bad Pony 1: *Passes an autoshop, then turns right onto the freeway*
Tim: *Catching up*
Bad Pony 1: Turn on the nitrous.
Bad Pony 2: *Turns on the nitrous*
Bad Pony 1: *Going faster*
Tim: They're using nitrous.
Julia: Two can play at that game.
Tim: Right. *Turns on the nitrous*
Bad Pony 2: *Lowers his window, and points out a Micro SMG. He fires twenty bullets at Tim, and Julia*
Tim: *Gets shot in the arm twice, hits another car, and goes on two wheels*
Pause the song. The car flipped onto it's side.
Julia: *Grabs the receiver*
Tim: Does the radio still work?
Julia: I'm checking that out now. *Talks in the receiver* GT24, we're out of it. Suspect is turning off the freeway, and onto Green Drive.
Toby: Now's our chance.
Red: GT12, we'll take it from here.
Tim: That's what I was afraid of.
Play the song again.
Bad Pony 1: *Passes a police station, fire house, and hospital.*
Toby: *Drives after the suspect after he passes him*
Bad Pony 1: *Turns left at the intersection*
Toby: *Turns on his sirens*
Bad Pony 2: Dammit. We got another cop on our tail.
Bad Pony 1: You know what to do. *Floors it as he passes a Mustang*
Toby: They're getting close to city limits.
Red: What do we do?
Bad Pony 2: *Firing bullets at them*
Toby: Return fire.
Red: *Opens her window, and shoots the back tire on the right side of the car*
Bad Pony 1: *Loses control, and goes into a field*
Stop the song
Toby: *Stops*
Red: We got them.
Bad Pony 2: I'm afraid I'm out of ammo.
Bad Pony 1: I knew we should have bought more.
And now we're at the ending credits. Song: link
When you read the ending credits between the dialogue, the characters pause in place.
Toby & Red: *Pointing guns at the bad ponies*
Bad Ponies: *Getting out of the car*
Toby & Red: *Arresting the bad ponies*
Larry Wilcox as Tim Miller
Rainbow Dash as Julia Rose
Tim: *His voice is heard with Toby's, Julia's, and Red's having a conversation with them in the future* I guess I owe you an apology Toby.
Toby: An apology, what for?
Tim: For not believing that you would be a good driver.
Also starring Sean Jefferson from SeanTheHedgehog
Bad Ponies: *Getting placed in the car*
Red: We just proved that we have what it takes to drive, and operate a radio.
Julia: Yeah, but everything you did after that wasn't too grand.
Toby Linnehan from SeanTheHedgehog
Toby: Whatever are you talking about?
Tim: Rumor has it that you got in an argument with the state troopers about who would be taking the suspects in.
Toby: *Backing up, but crashes into a State Trooper's police car*
Red Velvet from DragonAura15
Red: Hey, most of Neigh Jersey's State Troopers are known for having a bad attitude over everything.
Julia: Even so, it doesn't really help since you hit one of their cars.
Police cars furnished by Nissan, BMW, and Chevrolet
Police Pony: *Gets out of the car*
Julia: You two still have a lot to learn.
Police Pony: *Talking to Toby, and Red*
Toby: Damn.
Tim: Hey, it's nothing to be mad about. We went through the same routine too.
Motorcycles furnished by Kawasaki
Julia: I never did.
Tim: Yeah, okay Julia.
Julia: What? I really didn't!
Toby & Red: *Laughing*
Police Pony: *Taking the bad ponies out of Toby's car, and putting them into his*
The End
Gran Turismo, A SeanTheHedgehog & Dragonaura15 Production
Song (Start at 0:30): link
Double Scoop: Nothing can stop those guys. They'll get the bad guys no matter what. Our final show for the day, My Little Pornstar.
This is a parody of My Little Pony. The voice actors for the mane 6 are..
Ice Cube - Twilight Sparkle
Kath Soucie - Rainbow Dash
Sargent Schultz from Hogan's Heroes - Pinkie Pie
Wally from The Cleveland Show - Fluttershy
Tabitha St. Germain - Rarity
Ashleigh Ball - Applejack
Now, let's begin. Applejack was at Sweet Apple Acres with Big Macintosh. Instead of being brother, and sister, they are married, and Applebloom is their daughter.
Applejack: *Looking at all of the trees in her orchard* Man, that's a lot of trees out there.
Big Macintosh: *Uninterested* Eeyup.
Applejack: I'll have my work cut out for me.
Big Macintosh: Eenope.
Applejack: Beg your pardon?
Big Macintosh: That's too many trees for you to handle.
Applejack: Okay, you're making it sound like I'm having sex with them.
Big Macintosh: It ain't my fault. I'm just reading my script.
Applejack: Then fuck the script, and fuck you. I am going to get all of the apples off of those trees!
Intro
Theme song: link
Japanese Men: *Singing* My Rittre Pornstar. My Rittre Pornstar. Ah ah ah ah, My Rittre Pornstar.
Twilight: I used to wonder what friendship could be.
Japanese Men: My Rittre Pornstar.
Twilight: Then I found out it was for faggots.
Rainbow Dash: I think I can.
Pinkie Pie: I'm German!
Rarity: I want sex.
Applejack: Faithful, and strong.
Angel: *Shouting at Fluttershy* Hey Fluttershy, you smell like shit!!!!!
Twilight: Man, there's a lot of faggots in this town.
Japanese Men: My Rittre Pornstar. Despite everything, you are my best friends.
Meanwhile in the middle of Pornstarville, a herd of cows were running towards it. In other words, they were a stampede.
Rainbow Dash: *Sees the cows* Stampede!!
Ponies: *Running away*
Pinkie Pie: *Bouncing rapidly* I don't know what a stampede is, but it sounds wunderbar. *Sees the cows, and looks at her Volkswagen Beetle* Nein! Don't go anywhere towards my automobile! It's brand new!
Applejack: *Running toward the cows, and ties a rope around it's neck*
Cow: *Runs too fast, and dies*
Cows: *Stop running, and look at the dead cow*
Cow 35: Well, I'm out of here. *Puts on a hat, and smokes a cigar as it walks out of Pornstarville*
Cows: *Leave Pornstarville*
Later, they decided to hold a ceremony for Applejack, because she saved everyone's lives.... Apparently.
Mayor Mare: Alright everyone, today we will give Applejack this trophy. It's really big, and has to be put into a wagon so that she can pull it.
Ponies: Yay!
Applejack: *Feeling tired, as she gets her trophy* Hey, *Looks at herself in a reflection* I sure do look funny.
Twilight: *With Rainbow Dash, and Rarity* Yo, what da fuq is wrong with dat bitch?
Rainbow Dash: She looks tired.
Rarity: Perhaps she doesn't masturbate enough.
Rainbow Dash & Twilight: *Glare at Rarity* no.
Later on Applejack's farm
Applejack: *Kicking the trees, but is losing energy from being tired*
Twilight: *Arrives* Hey Applejack.
Applejack: *Looks away nervously*
Twilight: What da fuq is wrong wid you man?
Applejack: First off, I ain't a man, and second, nothing is wrong with me.
Twilight: Bullshit. You high on drugs, or somethin'?
Applejack: No, that's what you're supposed to do. Not me.
Twilight: Man what da fuq is dat supposed to mean man?!
Applejack: Yer a nigger, figure it out.
Twilight: Oh, you did not just go there!!
Applejack: I believe I did.
Twilight: Man, I don't have to fuck around with you. I'm gonna throw Spike in front of a moving truck. *Walks away*
Applejack: I feel sorry for anyone that has to deal with that purple asshole.
Meanwhile in Sugarcube Corner.
Applejack: Pinkie Pie, what are we making today?
Pinkie Pie: Today, we are going to make a special recipe from my country called chocolate cupcakes.
Applejack: America came up with it first.
Pinkie Pie: No, we germans invented chocolate. If it weren't for us, you wouldn't have your chocolate cupcakes.
Applejack: That's where you're wrong. The Aztecs came up with it.
Pinkie Pie: What are those?
Applejack: I don't know, some country in South America that got destroyed over two hundred years ago. It was before the revolutionary war, so I don't give a shit.
Pinkie Pie: Let's get started on our chocolate cupcakes.
Applejack: What do you need me to do?
Pinkie Pie: I need you to...
Applejack: *Falling asleep, and starts mixing random ingredients, with a flower, dirt, and part of her hat*
Later
Twilight: *Arrives with Spike at a hospital* Man, I don't even wanna be here.
Nurse Redheart: Twilight, thank goodness you came.
Twilight: How da fuq did you know my name?! I believe we never met before!
Nurse Redheart: Pinkie Pie told me all about you.
Twilight: Who is- *Sees Pinkie Pie* Oh right, dat pink German. *Walks to Pinkie Pie* Alright man, what happened?
Pinkie Pie: Applejack fell asleep on zhe job, and ruined everyzhing. Other zhen zhat, I know nothing!
Twilight: I believe you man. *Walks away, and looks at Nurse Redheart* And what's your name?
Nurse Redheart: Nurse Redheart.
Twilight: Right, I'll remember dat. *Leaves the hospital* Bye Nurse Redfart.
Nurse Redheart: *Farts* Well, that was ironic.
Back at Sweet Apple Acres, which isn't sweet anymore due to Applejack being an insomniac.
Applejack: *Tries to buck an appletree, but falls down, and sleeps*
Twilight: *Arrives* Man wut da fuq is wrong wid u?
Applejack: *Sleeping*
Twilight: She can't hear me. This gives me, an idea. *Has her horn glowing while she performs a spell*
Two hours later.
Applejack: *Wakes up, and finds herself tied to a chair* Hey, what's the meaning of this?! *Somehow manages to stand up, run backwards, and break the chair, allowing her to get loose* Back to work. *Goes to the apple trees, but sees that all of the apples are gone* NOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!
Twilight: *Selling the apples* Yes. I am making a shitload of money, from stolen apples.
Ponies: Cool, these apples are stolen, I'll pay $300 for two green apples.
Ending theme: link
Japanese Men: *Singing* My Rittre Pornstar. My Rittre Pornstar. *Waiting for the instrumental part of the song to end* My Rittre Pornstar, friend.
The End
Song: link
Double Scoop: When will Twilight stop being so depressed for crying out loud? Seriously, all she does is get angry over everything, and hate on everyone for no reason. Next week, we will return to our normal schedule, starting the show at 8 PM. Thanks for joining us at Sean's Spectacular Saturday of Stories.
Sean: *Looks at a grey hedgehog who looks just like him* Your name wouldn't happen to be Sean too, would it?
Sean The Hedgehog: It is. What a pleasure to meet you. I'll be back, I gotta insult Saten Twist, because he's playing as Alex Trebek.
Gordon: *Standing near a yard tower*
Hawkeye: What are you doing?
Gordon: Waiting.
Hawkeye: For what?
Gordon: *Gets hit a 2 ton bag of salt* Wrong pony!!!!
Rainbow Dash: Sorry!
Double Scoop: Welcome back to the S.S.S.S. Our final two shows for the day are...
Gran Turismo - Rated TV-PG
My Little Pornstar - Rated TV-MA for Mature Audiences
Double Scoop: It's action mixed in with comedy.
What to expect in this week's episode.
Tim: You're splitting us up?
Captain Jefferson: Just until Saturday. Someone's gotta teach the new guys what to do.
---
Pony: *Driving a sports car* Turn on the nitrous.
Pony 2: *Turns on the nitrous*
Pony: *Going faster*
---
Captain Jefferson: These two guys are wanted by the State Troopers, both in this state, and in Pennsylvania.
Tim: *Driving after the bad guys*
Captain Jefferson: We gotta be on our game.
Tim: *Hits another car, and goes on two wheels*
Song: link
Julia: *Driving her police car on the round freeway*
Tim: *Sitting next to her*
Gran Turismo
Starring Larry Wilcox as Tim Miller
Rainbow Dash as Julia Rose
Tim: *Talks on the radio*
Julia: *Increases speed in the car while turning on the police lights*
Also starring Sean Jefferson from SeanTheHedgehog
Toby Linnehan from SeanTheHedgehog
And Red Velvet from Dragonaura15
Tim & Julia: *Walking out of the barracks, and to their police car*
Episode 2: Flying From Town To Town
Special Guest Stars, Bartholomew Perfect the 55th from SeanTheHedgehog
And Rick Jones from SeanTheHedgehog
Tim: I'm still mad at you for lying about that chase.
Julia: What are you talking about?
Tim: You told the Captain I was driving when our suspect crashed into that garbage truck.
Julia: If you're mad about it, why don't you stop working with me then?
Tim: It's not that serious.
Captain Jefferson: *Arrives* Oh good, you two haven't left yet.
Julia: How come?
Captain Jefferson: You two will stop working together for a while.
Tim, and Julia stared at each other. They weren't expecting the Captain to mention something they were talking about earlier.
Captain Jefferson: Two new recruits just arrived, a little later than scheduled. You're going to work with them for a while.
Tim: You're splitting us up?
Captain Jefferson: Just until Saturday. Someone's gotta teach the new guys what to do.
Julia: Where are they?
They spotted the new ponies coming outside of the barracks, and walking towards them.
Captain Jefferson: I'd like you two to meet Toby Linnehan, and Red Velvet.
Toby: Hi.
Red: Pleasure to meet you.
Tim: Likewise.
Captain Jefferson: Red, you're working with Julia. Tim, you take Toby around town in one of our Caprices.
Tim: Yes sir. *Walks with Toby to a police car*
Red: Would you like me to drive?
Julia: Sure.
Meanwhile, Toby was thinking about Julia.
Toby: That blue pegasus is smoking hot.
Tim: Yeah, well keep your mind on the radio. *Gets into the driver's seat*
Toby: Alright. *Sits down next to Tim*
Tim: *Drives out of the parking lot, and turns left. He drives towards the docks*
Red: *Driving the M4 to the road*
Julia: Turn right.
Red: *Turns right* So how long have you known Tim?
Julia: Since yesterday.
Red: Do you know if he's single?
Julia: With good looks like that, I doubt it.
Red: *Looks at Julia* I want him to be mine.
Julia: Keep your eyes on the road.
Red: *Looks at the road while she drives*
Julia: We're not allowed to date anyone that we work with.
Red: *Her smile disappears*
Red was driving the police car with Julia sitting next to her.
Red: *Turns right, and crosses the railroad tracks. Then she drives under the highway*
Mare: *Running towards them*
Julia: Pull over, and let's see what she wants.
Red: *Pulls over behind a FedEx van*
Mare: You two officers gotta help me. An orange unicorn stole my Porsche.
Song: link
Tim: *Driving northbound passing a police station, and a hospital*
Dispatch: GT12, be on the lookout for a stolen vehicle. Your target is a Porsche 918 Spyder.
A picture of the car appeared on Tim's front window
Toby: GT12, responding.
Tim: *Turns on the siren, and lights*
In front of them was an intersection. They saw Red, and Julia chasing the Porsche, going to the right.
Tim: *Speeds up, and turns right*
Ponies: *Dealing with a car accident*
The Porsche turned left, and was heading for the Round Freeway. He took another left, and was heading the wrong way.
Julia: *On the radio* He's going against the traffic!
Tim: This guy has to be stopped now.
Red: *Catching up to the Porsche*
Ponies: *Steering out of the way*
Red: *Taps it*
The Porsche spun out of control. Stop the song.
Julia: Suspect has spun out.
Red: *Stops behind the Porsche*
Tim: *Gets in front of the Porsche*
In the car was Bartholomew Perfect The 55th.
Bartholomew: *Gets out* Well, this certainly could have gone better.
Toby: *Gets out* Place your hooves on your head. *Arresting Bartholomew* You're under arrest for Grand Theft.
Bartholomew: Spare me the details.
Toby: You know you could have killed someone going the wrong way? Get in. *Opens the back door*
Bartholomew: *Gets inside the car*
Toby: *Sits next to Tim*
Tim: They trained you well. *Turns the car around, and goes off the freeway*
Red: *Follows Tim*
Tim, and Julia met up in the parking lot near their station after their shift ended.
Tim: You wanted to see me?
Julia: I need a ride to Local Consideration.
Tim: Okay. *Walks with Julia to his Viper*
Halfway to Local Consideration, Julia decided to talk to Tim.
Julia: Do you enjoy working with Toby?
Tim: Sure. How's Red treating you?
Julia: She has a crush on you.
Tim: I see.
Julia: What do you think about Toby?
Tim: He thinks you're smoking hot.
Julia: These new guys both have a crush on us.
Tim: I know how to get Red away from me, but I'm not sure how to stop Toby.
Julia: I know someone that'll love dating Toby.
Tim: *Turns left, and passes a Fire Department, and a hospital* I bet she has curves just like yours.
Julia: Oh stop it. *Playfully hits Tim's shoulder while laughing*
Tim: Here we are. *Stops at Local Consideration*
Julia: Don't go anywhere yet. Stay here until I come out.
Tim: Okay.
Julia: *Gets out of the car, and walks to the shop*
Tim: *Sticks his head out of the window* What do you have planned?
Julia: It's a surprise.
Tim: *Waits*
A few seconds later, a loud engine could be heard inside the shop.
Tim: What is she-
Julia: *Does a burnout on her motorcycle, then stops to the left of Tim's Viper* I just got new tires! What do you think?
Tim: They're nice. They look like tires that have a lot of grip.
Julia: See you tomorrow Tim. *Rides off on her motorcycle*
Tim: *Drives off in his Viper*
It started to get dark, as Tim stopped at a friend's house.
Tim: *Knocks on the door four times*
Rick: *Opens the door, and is excited when he sees who is at the front door* Tim Miller! I haven't seen you in a month.
Tim: Yeah, it's been a long time. Hasn't it?
Rick: Come on in.
Tim: Don't mind if I do. *Walks in*
They sat down at a table. Rick got himself, and Tim a can of 7-Up.
Rick: *Opens his can* So, how's the Police Department treating you? *Drinking his soda*
Tim: Fine. That's actually why I came to see you.
Rick: Why? What's up?
Tim: *Opens his can, and takes a small sip* There's this mare that joined us. She seems to be attracted to me, but we're not allowed to date other officers.
Rick: Right. Why are you telling me this?
Tim: You said you wanted a mare to date, and I think she'd be good for you.
Rick: Well, if you say so. How are you going to introduce me?
Tim: Come down to the station as soon as you can, and ask to see me, and Red Velvet. I'll handle everything else once we come to see you.
Rick: I got it. Thanks Tim.
Tim: No problem man. Cheers.
They tapped their soda cans together, and drank what was left inside of it.
Next morning, Captain Jefferson was talking to his officers in the briefing room.
Captain Jefferson: We're getting reports from the State Troopers of two ponies killing officers for fun. They're currently in Ponyville, but they think the suspects might come towards us. These two guys are wanted by the State Troopers, both in this state, and in Pennsylvania. If they do show up here, we need to stop them quickly, before anypony gets hurt. We gotta be on our game.
Officers: Yes sir.
Captain Jefferson: That's what I like to hear. Get out there.
Officers: *Leaving*
Julia: Okay Red, it's your turn to operate the radio.
Red: Alright.
Tim: And it's your turn to drive.
Toby: Sweet.
But Toby was not good at driving, and Red wasn't good with operating a radio.
Song: link
Red: *Talking on the radio, but can't remember what street she's on*
Toby: *Driving after a stolen van, but crashes into a street lamp*
Red: *Talking on the radio, but drops the receiver*
Julia: *Shakes her head in annoyance*
Tim: *Pointing to a bank robber*
Toby: *Shoots at the bank robber, but shoots two pedestrians instead*
Tim: *Takes the gun out of Toby's hooves*
Toby: *Driving after a suspect behind Julia, but hits her car*
Julia: *Spins out of control*
Toby: *Stops the car*
Tim: What the hell did you stop for?
Toby: To see if Julia's okay.
Tim: She's fine, but you're not supposed to stop for anything when chasing a suspect.
Toby: Other police departments do that.
Tim: Not us. *Sighs* I don't think you have what it takes to drive a car.
Julia: You don't have what it takes to operate a radio.
Red: *Covers her head in shame* I'm sorry.
Julia: *Worried* Wait, don't take it so hard. I'm sorry. You will get better at it, but we neeed some more training.
Red: *Looks up at Julia* Okay.
The next day was Saturday. Captain Jefferson talked to Julia, and Tim in his office.
Captain Jefferson: So, how did everything go with Toby, and Red?
Tim: Okay. Just don't let Toby drive anytime soon.
Julia: Red needs more training with operating a radio.
Captain Jefferson: Okay. Everything else went fine though. Right?
Tim: Yes sir.
Mare: *Arrives* Tim Miller?
Tim: Yes?
Mare: A friend of yours named Rick Jones is here to see you, and Red Velvet.
Tim: Perfect. Excuse me. *Goes to talk to Rick*
He arrived the same time Red did.
Red: *Spots Tim* Hey sexy.
Tim: Red, we need to talk.
Red: Anything for you.
Tim: You know we're not allowed to date, right?
Red: What are you talking about?
Tim: We work together. Officers in the same department are not allowed to date each other.
Red: Bummer.
Tim: However, there is a pony I'd like you to meet. Rick Jones.
Rick: Hi. Tim told me all about you.
Red: And you look sexier than him.
Tim: *Laughs* Okay, you two get yourself acquainted, and I'll see you later.
That night, Rick took Red out to dinner.
Red: You're such a gentlecolt. I like that.
Rick: And you will like this place. I got us reservations at the most expensive restaurant this town has to offer. *Stops the car*
An Acura was speeding down the road.
Rick: *Crossing the street with Red*
Acura Pony: *Honks his horn, and hits the brakes. He hits Red*
Red: *Flies into the back windshield of an Explorer*
Acura Pony: Oh my goodness. *Gets out*
Rick: Red, are you okay?
Red: *Gets out her police badge*
Acura Pony: i hit a cop.
Police Pony: *Stops in a Nissan Skyline police car* GT3, I got a pony with a red Acura who hit a pedestrian. Send over an ambulance, and a Caprice.
Dispatch: Ten-4 GT3.
Red was taken into the hospital to be treated. X rays were taken of her bones, and only her back legs were broken.
Rick: I'm sorry this happened.
Red: It's not your fault.
Tim: The stallion who ran you over has been arrested. He turned himself in.
Red: When do I get back to work?
Tim: Soon. The Captain will talk to you about that.
Two days later, Red returned to work with Toby. She couldn't drive, so she had to work the radio, while Toby would do the driving.
Tim: *Driving the police car*
Julia: It feels great to be back in the M4.
Tim: I'll say.
Dispatch: Attention all units, an important message from Captain Jefferson.
Captain Jefferson: The cop killers have finally entered Gran Turismo. They just entered our town heading southbound. Your target is a black Camaro.
A picture of the car appeared on the front window
Song: link
Tim: *Turns right. He's on the road that the suspects are on, heading towards them*
Julia: Are you thinking what I'm thinking?
Tim: We block the road as soon as we spot our suspect.
Bad Ponies: *Passing a railroad crossing*
Tim: There they are. *Brakes, and slides the car sideways to block the road*
Bad Ponies: *Driving on the sidewalk to avoid Tim*
Tim: *Backs up, and turns left*
Bad Ponies: *Making a left turn*
Tim: *Driving after the bad ponies*
Julia: GT24, we spotted the suspects on Helsun Boulevard.
Red: GT12, westbound on Green Drive. Do you need backup?
Tim: No.
Julia: Negative. We're fine for now. We'll call you when we need backup.
Bad Pony 1: *Driving fast, and turns right after passing a police station*
Bad Pony 2: You ever been in this city before?
Bad Pony 1: No.
Bad Pony 2: Well I have. Make a left.
Bad Pony 1: *Turns left, and goes over a bridge crossing a river*
Tim: He's heading for the freeway.
Bad Pony 1: *Passes an autoshop, then turns right onto the freeway*
Tim: *Catching up*
Bad Pony 1: Turn on the nitrous.
Bad Pony 2: *Turns on the nitrous*
Bad Pony 1: *Going faster*
Tim: They're using nitrous.
Julia: Two can play at that game.
Tim: Right. *Turns on the nitrous*
Bad Pony 2: *Lowers his window, and points out a Micro SMG. He fires twenty bullets at Tim, and Julia*
Tim: *Gets shot in the arm twice, hits another car, and goes on two wheels*
Pause the song. The car flipped onto it's side.
Julia: *Grabs the receiver*
Tim: Does the radio still work?
Julia: I'm checking that out now. *Talks in the receiver* GT24, we're out of it. Suspect is turning off the freeway, and onto Green Drive.
Toby: Now's our chance.
Red: GT12, we'll take it from here.
Tim: That's what I was afraid of.
Play the song again.
Bad Pony 1: *Passes a police station, fire house, and hospital.*
Toby: *Drives after the suspect after he passes him*
Bad Pony 1: *Turns left at the intersection*
Toby: *Turns on his sirens*
Bad Pony 2: Dammit. We got another cop on our tail.
Bad Pony 1: You know what to do. *Floors it as he passes a Mustang*
Toby: They're getting close to city limits.
Red: What do we do?
Bad Pony 2: *Firing bullets at them*
Toby: Return fire.
Red: *Opens her window, and shoots the back tire on the right side of the car*
Bad Pony 1: *Loses control, and goes into a field*
Stop the song
Toby: *Stops*
Red: We got them.
Bad Pony 2: I'm afraid I'm out of ammo.
Bad Pony 1: I knew we should have bought more.
And now we're at the ending credits. Song: link
When you read the ending credits between the dialogue, the characters pause in place.
Toby & Red: *Pointing guns at the bad ponies*
Bad Ponies: *Getting out of the car*
Toby & Red: *Arresting the bad ponies*
Larry Wilcox as Tim Miller
Rainbow Dash as Julia Rose
Tim: *His voice is heard with Toby's, Julia's, and Red's having a conversation with them in the future* I guess I owe you an apology Toby.
Toby: An apology, what for?
Tim: For not believing that you would be a good driver.
Also starring Sean Jefferson from SeanTheHedgehog
Bad Ponies: *Getting placed in the car*
Red: We just proved that we have what it takes to drive, and operate a radio.
Julia: Yeah, but everything you did after that wasn't too grand.
Toby Linnehan from SeanTheHedgehog
Toby: Whatever are you talking about?
Tim: Rumor has it that you got in an argument with the state troopers about who would be taking the suspects in.
Toby: *Backing up, but crashes into a State Trooper's police car*
Red Velvet from DragonAura15
Red: Hey, most of Neigh Jersey's State Troopers are known for having a bad attitude over everything.
Julia: Even so, it doesn't really help since you hit one of their cars.
Police cars furnished by Nissan, BMW, and Chevrolet
Police Pony: *Gets out of the car*
Julia: You two still have a lot to learn.
Police Pony: *Talking to Toby, and Red*
Toby: Damn.
Tim: Hey, it's nothing to be mad about. We went through the same routine too.
Motorcycles furnished by Kawasaki
Julia: I never did.
Tim: Yeah, okay Julia.
Julia: What? I really didn't!
Toby & Red: *Laughing*
Police Pony: *Taking the bad ponies out of Toby's car, and putting them into his*
The End
Gran Turismo, A SeanTheHedgehog & Dragonaura15 Production
Song (Start at 0:30): link
Double Scoop: Nothing can stop those guys. They'll get the bad guys no matter what. Our final show for the day, My Little Pornstar.
This is a parody of My Little Pony. The voice actors for the mane 6 are..
Ice Cube - Twilight Sparkle
Kath Soucie - Rainbow Dash
Sargent Schultz from Hogan's Heroes - Pinkie Pie
Wally from The Cleveland Show - Fluttershy
Tabitha St. Germain - Rarity
Ashleigh Ball - Applejack
Now, let's begin. Applejack was at Sweet Apple Acres with Big Macintosh. Instead of being brother, and sister, they are married, and Applebloom is their daughter.
Applejack: *Looking at all of the trees in her orchard* Man, that's a lot of trees out there.
Big Macintosh: *Uninterested* Eeyup.
Applejack: I'll have my work cut out for me.
Big Macintosh: Eenope.
Applejack: Beg your pardon?
Big Macintosh: That's too many trees for you to handle.
Applejack: Okay, you're making it sound like I'm having sex with them.
Big Macintosh: It ain't my fault. I'm just reading my script.
Applejack: Then fuck the script, and fuck you. I am going to get all of the apples off of those trees!
Intro
Theme song: link
Japanese Men: *Singing* My Rittre Pornstar. My Rittre Pornstar. Ah ah ah ah, My Rittre Pornstar.
Twilight: I used to wonder what friendship could be.
Japanese Men: My Rittre Pornstar.
Twilight: Then I found out it was for faggots.
Rainbow Dash: I think I can.
Pinkie Pie: I'm German!
Rarity: I want sex.
Applejack: Faithful, and strong.
Angel: *Shouting at Fluttershy* Hey Fluttershy, you smell like shit!!!!!
Twilight: Man, there's a lot of faggots in this town.
Japanese Men: My Rittre Pornstar. Despite everything, you are my best friends.
Meanwhile in the middle of Pornstarville, a herd of cows were running towards it. In other words, they were a stampede.
Rainbow Dash: *Sees the cows* Stampede!!
Ponies: *Running away*
Pinkie Pie: *Bouncing rapidly* I don't know what a stampede is, but it sounds wunderbar. *Sees the cows, and looks at her Volkswagen Beetle* Nein! Don't go anywhere towards my automobile! It's brand new!
Applejack: *Running toward the cows, and ties a rope around it's neck*
Cow: *Runs too fast, and dies*
Cows: *Stop running, and look at the dead cow*
Cow 35: Well, I'm out of here. *Puts on a hat, and smokes a cigar as it walks out of Pornstarville*
Cows: *Leave Pornstarville*
Later, they decided to hold a ceremony for Applejack, because she saved everyone's lives.... Apparently.
Mayor Mare: Alright everyone, today we will give Applejack this trophy. It's really big, and has to be put into a wagon so that she can pull it.
Ponies: Yay!
Applejack: *Feeling tired, as she gets her trophy* Hey, *Looks at herself in a reflection* I sure do look funny.
Twilight: *With Rainbow Dash, and Rarity* Yo, what da fuq is wrong with dat bitch?
Rainbow Dash: She looks tired.
Rarity: Perhaps she doesn't masturbate enough.
Rainbow Dash & Twilight: *Glare at Rarity* no.
Later on Applejack's farm
Applejack: *Kicking the trees, but is losing energy from being tired*
Twilight: *Arrives* Hey Applejack.
Applejack: *Looks away nervously*
Twilight: What da fuq is wrong wid you man?
Applejack: First off, I ain't a man, and second, nothing is wrong with me.
Twilight: Bullshit. You high on drugs, or somethin'?
Applejack: No, that's what you're supposed to do. Not me.
Twilight: Man what da fuq is dat supposed to mean man?!
Applejack: Yer a nigger, figure it out.
Twilight: Oh, you did not just go there!!
Applejack: I believe I did.
Twilight: Man, I don't have to fuck around with you. I'm gonna throw Spike in front of a moving truck. *Walks away*
Applejack: I feel sorry for anyone that has to deal with that purple asshole.
Meanwhile in Sugarcube Corner.
Applejack: Pinkie Pie, what are we making today?
Pinkie Pie: Today, we are going to make a special recipe from my country called chocolate cupcakes.
Applejack: America came up with it first.
Pinkie Pie: No, we germans invented chocolate. If it weren't for us, you wouldn't have your chocolate cupcakes.
Applejack: That's where you're wrong. The Aztecs came up with it.
Pinkie Pie: What are those?
Applejack: I don't know, some country in South America that got destroyed over two hundred years ago. It was before the revolutionary war, so I don't give a shit.
Pinkie Pie: Let's get started on our chocolate cupcakes.
Applejack: What do you need me to do?
Pinkie Pie: I need you to...
Applejack: *Falling asleep, and starts mixing random ingredients, with a flower, dirt, and part of her hat*
Later
Twilight: *Arrives with Spike at a hospital* Man, I don't even wanna be here.
Nurse Redheart: Twilight, thank goodness you came.
Twilight: How da fuq did you know my name?! I believe we never met before!
Nurse Redheart: Pinkie Pie told me all about you.
Twilight: Who is- *Sees Pinkie Pie* Oh right, dat pink German. *Walks to Pinkie Pie* Alright man, what happened?
Pinkie Pie: Applejack fell asleep on zhe job, and ruined everyzhing. Other zhen zhat, I know nothing!
Twilight: I believe you man. *Walks away, and looks at Nurse Redheart* And what's your name?
Nurse Redheart: Nurse Redheart.
Twilight: Right, I'll remember dat. *Leaves the hospital* Bye Nurse Redfart.
Nurse Redheart: *Farts* Well, that was ironic.
Back at Sweet Apple Acres, which isn't sweet anymore due to Applejack being an insomniac.
Applejack: *Tries to buck an appletree, but falls down, and sleeps*
Twilight: *Arrives* Man wut da fuq is wrong wid u?
Applejack: *Sleeping*
Twilight: She can't hear me. This gives me, an idea. *Has her horn glowing while she performs a spell*
Two hours later.
Applejack: *Wakes up, and finds herself tied to a chair* Hey, what's the meaning of this?! *Somehow manages to stand up, run backwards, and break the chair, allowing her to get loose* Back to work. *Goes to the apple trees, but sees that all of the apples are gone* NOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!
Twilight: *Selling the apples* Yes. I am making a shitload of money, from stolen apples.
Ponies: Cool, these apples are stolen, I'll pay $300 for two green apples.
Ending theme: link
Japanese Men: *Singing* My Rittre Pornstar. My Rittre Pornstar. *Waiting for the instrumental part of the song to end* My Rittre Pornstar, friend.
The End
Song: link
Double Scoop: When will Twilight stop being so depressed for crying out loud? Seriously, all she does is get angry over everything, and hate on everyone for no reason. Next week, we will return to our normal schedule, starting the show at 8 PM. Thanks for joining us at Sean's Spectacular Saturday of Stories.
After the Rage Guy, this was the second of the rage comic characters to appear. He appeared as a character in a 4chan comic known as April Fools and it shows him as a disappointed or lonely person. However, he didn't gain popularity until he appeared in his second comic known as Prom FUUU, which soon gained hundreds of fans.
After that, Forever Alone began to flood rage comics all over the internet. He was shown. He is shown to use humor in the suffering of people who are still single.
Now, it is time for the score. The final score for this meme is a Fail. I'm sorry, but I just feel as though that this meme is a little overused. If it wasn't used so much, I may not hate it, but sorry, I do. That's it for this review, I will see you all next time