We all know Nintendo for being such a family friendly group with colorful and fun games, and they have so much wonderful characters, who are so friendly and nice… Or at least, that’s what they want you to think. They may look nice on the outside, but if you think about it, they are pure evil. So, today, I am going to share five of the most evil Nintendo protagonists. First, some rules. Only one game per franchise, and only from games that I have played. Also, Nintendo games only, so only games from Nintendo consoles. With that said, let us start the list
#5: Trainer from Pokemon
Sure, he may just be a young ten year old boy who aspires to be the very best like no one ever was. But, he isn’t the most nicest of children. Sure, you could put everyone in the world on this list, but he’s the protagonist, so he goes on the list. This kids dream consists of him going out into the wild and taking innocent wild animals out of their homes, and then forces them to fight their Pokemon brethren in tournaments for the entertainment of humans. And to make matters worse, he will use his use his Pokemon to defeat the Pokemon’s of younger Pokemon trainers and then takes their money, which is how the Pokemon Trainer makes his fortune. It may not be much, but it’s a start
#4: Kirby from Kirby
Aww, look at this little cute ball of whatever. How could this thing possibly be evil? Trust me, he may not look like it, but this thing is pure evil. What he does is so much worse than death. If Kirby spots you, you’d better run. Because if you are walking in his way, he will not hesitate to open his mouth and devour you. But trust me, he won’t just devour you. As bad as that would be on it’s own, he does more than just devour. What he does next is he takes whatever abilities you may have, weather it’s swords, fire, or ninja stars, and he will then use it on everyone he meets along the way, not caring about slaughtering adorable creatures along the way in a very violent fashion. I am telling you, Sonic for Hire got it down perfectly with Kirby, despite how nightmarishly evil Kirby is.
#3: Olimar from Pikmin
When you are an astronaut away from home and your ship crash lands on an alien planet, what is the first thing you want to do? Get the ship fixed and head home? Yes. And that is what Olimar does…. but not before enslaving the entire Pikmin race. Throughout the game, Olimar is searching long and hard for the pieces of his missing ship. However, he uses the Pikmin that he has enslaved as ways to help him collect the ship. It wouldn’t be so bad, if it wasn’t for the fact that the Pikmin drown, burn, get eaten, get poisoned, get squashed, and dissolved all because Olimar doesn’t want to fight himself, so he sends the innocent Pikmin to go and die for him so he can head home. And there is in fact one ending that could prove how awful Olimar is, if you let him get turned into a Pikmin by the Pikmin. Karma really is a bitch, Olimar.
#2: Link from The Legend of Zelda
Sure, we all know that Link is the hero of time. He has done many things, like save Zelda, defeat Ganondorf, save Termina, defeat the Ghost Ship, and do many other things for the world, but what about the other things. Sure, those things may be forgiven for some of his petty crimes, but petty crimes are still crimes. And let me tell you, Link has done quite a lot of things. Link has been known for breaking into people’s homes, breaks their belongings, steals all of their money, sneaks onto private property, disturbs the dead, attacks royal guards in Link the the Past, assaults females in Ocarina of Time and Majora’s Mask (Granted, they are criminals, but still), he shoots arrows at the Gorman Brothers, throws Medli into a wall in Wind Waker, can throw bombs and shoot arrows at villagers, and killed Skull Kid in Ocarina of Time. I know that he did attack Link, but he was friendly to child Link. That doesn’t mean he should die. Jeez, Link. Forget petty crimes. That’s fullon homicide.
#1: Mario from Super Mario Bros.
That’s right, the most famous icon of gaming is actually evil. And how so? Well, let’s start with some things. Throughout the entire series, we have seen Goombas and Koopas as the enemies. However, despite that they are the weakest enemies in the game, do they really deserve to die. And not just die, but have their heads crushed by Mario? I mean, that sounds a bit horrifying, don’t you think. Another thing to point out is that Mario is also incredibly greedy. In every single game, Mario is going around, picking up coins like there’s no tomorrow. By this point in Mario’s career, he has probably collected over a billion coins. And then there is the mention of the blocks. Sure, the blocks may look like regular cubic bricks, but really, those blocks are actually Toads, who have been turned into blocks by Bowser. And Mario responds by smashing them with his head. He is literally committing Toad genocide and doesn’t care. And let’s not forget his “pal”, Yoshi, as he will gladly sacrifice Yoshi and kill him in order to make it to the flagpole, not giving a damn about Yoshi’s fate. Wow, I think Game Theory got it right. Mario is a damn sociopath, and is easily the most evil Nintendo protagonist ever…. maybe. I don’t know. Maybe I’m thinking into this a bit much
Well, there you have it. Did you enjoy the list? Tell me what you thought of it below. With that said, I will see you all next time
#5: Trainer from Pokemon
Sure, he may just be a young ten year old boy who aspires to be the very best like no one ever was. But, he isn’t the most nicest of children. Sure, you could put everyone in the world on this list, but he’s the protagonist, so he goes on the list. This kids dream consists of him going out into the wild and taking innocent wild animals out of their homes, and then forces them to fight their Pokemon brethren in tournaments for the entertainment of humans. And to make matters worse, he will use his use his Pokemon to defeat the Pokemon’s of younger Pokemon trainers and then takes their money, which is how the Pokemon Trainer makes his fortune. It may not be much, but it’s a start
#4: Kirby from Kirby
Aww, look at this little cute ball of whatever. How could this thing possibly be evil? Trust me, he may not look like it, but this thing is pure evil. What he does is so much worse than death. If Kirby spots you, you’d better run. Because if you are walking in his way, he will not hesitate to open his mouth and devour you. But trust me, he won’t just devour you. As bad as that would be on it’s own, he does more than just devour. What he does next is he takes whatever abilities you may have, weather it’s swords, fire, or ninja stars, and he will then use it on everyone he meets along the way, not caring about slaughtering adorable creatures along the way in a very violent fashion. I am telling you, Sonic for Hire got it down perfectly with Kirby, despite how nightmarishly evil Kirby is.
#3: Olimar from Pikmin
When you are an astronaut away from home and your ship crash lands on an alien planet, what is the first thing you want to do? Get the ship fixed and head home? Yes. And that is what Olimar does…. but not before enslaving the entire Pikmin race. Throughout the game, Olimar is searching long and hard for the pieces of his missing ship. However, he uses the Pikmin that he has enslaved as ways to help him collect the ship. It wouldn’t be so bad, if it wasn’t for the fact that the Pikmin drown, burn, get eaten, get poisoned, get squashed, and dissolved all because Olimar doesn’t want to fight himself, so he sends the innocent Pikmin to go and die for him so he can head home. And there is in fact one ending that could prove how awful Olimar is, if you let him get turned into a Pikmin by the Pikmin. Karma really is a bitch, Olimar.
#2: Link from The Legend of Zelda
Sure, we all know that Link is the hero of time. He has done many things, like save Zelda, defeat Ganondorf, save Termina, defeat the Ghost Ship, and do many other things for the world, but what about the other things. Sure, those things may be forgiven for some of his petty crimes, but petty crimes are still crimes. And let me tell you, Link has done quite a lot of things. Link has been known for breaking into people’s homes, breaks their belongings, steals all of their money, sneaks onto private property, disturbs the dead, attacks royal guards in Link the the Past, assaults females in Ocarina of Time and Majora’s Mask (Granted, they are criminals, but still), he shoots arrows at the Gorman Brothers, throws Medli into a wall in Wind Waker, can throw bombs and shoot arrows at villagers, and killed Skull Kid in Ocarina of Time. I know that he did attack Link, but he was friendly to child Link. That doesn’t mean he should die. Jeez, Link. Forget petty crimes. That’s fullon homicide.
#1: Mario from Super Mario Bros.
That’s right, the most famous icon of gaming is actually evil. And how so? Well, let’s start with some things. Throughout the entire series, we have seen Goombas and Koopas as the enemies. However, despite that they are the weakest enemies in the game, do they really deserve to die. And not just die, but have their heads crushed by Mario? I mean, that sounds a bit horrifying, don’t you think. Another thing to point out is that Mario is also incredibly greedy. In every single game, Mario is going around, picking up coins like there’s no tomorrow. By this point in Mario’s career, he has probably collected over a billion coins. And then there is the mention of the blocks. Sure, the blocks may look like regular cubic bricks, but really, those blocks are actually Toads, who have been turned into blocks by Bowser. And Mario responds by smashing them with his head. He is literally committing Toad genocide and doesn’t care. And let’s not forget his “pal”, Yoshi, as he will gladly sacrifice Yoshi and kill him in order to make it to the flagpole, not giving a damn about Yoshi’s fate. Wow, I think Game Theory got it right. Mario is a damn sociopath, and is easily the most evil Nintendo protagonist ever…. maybe. I don’t know. Maybe I’m thinking into this a bit much
Well, there you have it. Did you enjoy the list? Tell me what you thought of it below. With that said, I will see you all next time