Now, like I said before, Zelda has a lot of great bosses. But, then there are the bosses that are just… bad. So, I want to talk about the bosses that I find to be the worst. Remember that this is my opinion. If there are any bosses that you wanted on here, then I just thought the ones on my list were worse. Now, with that said, lets start the list
#10: Jalhalla - Now, this boss fight may not have been too bad, but this was more of his design and how he acted. The Earth Temple was a great temple. It was challenging, but it was also very scary. So, I kept thinking the temples boss was going to be something scary… then I remembered that Ocarina of Time’s Shadow Temple had Bango Bango, which looks more like a mutated penis. In other words, Jalhalla was a complete disappointment. Seriously, its a giant fat ghost. Hell, he is so fat that it takes a while to get his fat ass off the ground. You can even roll him around like a bowling ball to damage him. Like I said, his boss fight wasn’t too bad, but it wasn’t too fun either. That’s why it is only #10
#9: Gohdan from Wind Waker - Now, Gohdan is said to be the most amazing piece of technology in all of the world, and was created by the gods to test Link to see if he was actually the hero of time. So, were the gods drunk when they made him, because, all I see is a trend going on here. Nintendo seems to have a habit with making bosses with a weak spot on their hands and later, somewhere on the head. And Gohdan is exactly that. Not only is he unoriginal, but, if you run out of bombs and arrows, the only things that can kill him, he gives you MORE. What kind of advanced technology helps his opponent defeat him… The temple was pretty cool though
#8: Morpheel Phase 2 from Twilight Princess - Now, people have actually said that this boss fight was cool. Mainly because he is large and can fly around… But, that’s it. He’s large and flies around. Nothing else. Now, while the first phase sucked as well, at least he attacked you. All he does in the second phase is swim around. It’s just pathetic. And people still say this is cool. You want to see something like this that is actually cool. Fight Molgera from Wind Waker. He flies, and, get this, HE ATTACKS YOU! TAKE NOTES, MORPHEEL
#7: King Dodongo from Ocarina of Time - How is it possible to make a boss weaker than the first boss. Yes, I think King Dodongo is easier than Gohma. He fires fireballs at you, which lets you throw bombs into his mouth, and he rolls around, which can also be avoided if you have the Hylian Shield, or just stand in a corner. Not to mention, if you run out of bombs, there are more just lying around. I mean come on, it’s as if King Dodongo WANTS you to kill him. Then again, if he is really this easy, I can’t blame him
#6: Twinmold from Majora’s Mask - OH, COME ON, STONE TOWER TEMPLE! You were so close to being a perfect temple. I mean SO CLOSE! And then you give us a boss like THIS! People have said that Twinmold is a fun boss, because you use the Giant’s Mask on him. But, that just makes the fight easier. All Twinmold does is fly around. In other words, Twinmold is just Morpheel, only there’s two of them. Yeah, because EVERYONE wanted two of one boring boss. This boss fight is just boring. I honestly can’t see why people like it so much
#5: Moldorm from a Link to the Past - Now, after going up the large tower, you then meet Moldorm. All he does is walk around the area. Trust me, that is much more annoying than it sounds. You need to attack the weak spot on his back. However, that is easier said than done, because with every hit he takes, he gets even faster. And, if you are not careful, he will knock you off the platform, and you will have to start the whole fight from the beginning. Grantide, there are hearts at the bottom so you can regenerate health, but that is only limited. Moldorm healing himself completely, however, is infinite
#4: The Imprisoned from Skyward Sword - Now, this is a boss you fight three times. In other words, THIS IS THE SHIT VERSION OF THE GHIRAHIM FIGHTS! The first fight, you need to hit the weak spots on his foot. This phase is tolerable. Nothing fun, but, not too bad… Phase two is where things REALLY start to get bad. You need to attack his weak spots again to make him fall, then when that’s done, you need to use the catapult as Groose to launch bombs at him to attack his weak spot. But, since it is so small and he is always moving, you will barely get a chance to hit it. Ooh, and then there’s the part where you need to get on top of his head. He will always move away from you, making landing on him near impossible. And if he flings you off, … Well, just be prepared for a long run back up to where you were. Then there’s Phase 3… It’s just like Phase 2, only he has arms now… THIS FIGHT SUCKS
#3: Angler Fish from Link’s Awakening - …… It’s a fish….. He can be killed in 5 seconds flat…….. Do I even need to go on
#2: Morpha from Ocarina of Time - Oh, god. How is it possible to fuck up this badly. You thought a fish was a stupid idea, well, how about just water. Fucking water of all things is a boss. Now, this fight can either be insanely annoying, or pathetically easy. It is annoying because Morpha has one attack, where he grabs you, squeezes you, and then flings you away. This attack can take away at least three hearts. And he will kill you if you are not a pro at Zelda. But, he is easy because, what’s you get the nucleus out, you can actually keep using the Longshot to drag him to a corner, and then trap him there and just wail at him until he dies. I actually tried this trick and defeated Morpha IN 11 SECONDS! How do you make a boss suck so bad, that the temples mini-boss was better than this. Seriously, no one at Nintendo thought that Dark Link should have been the temples boss
#1: Gyorg from Majora’s Mask - Oh dear god, not this fucking thing. Yeah, I know I said that Morpha’s design was dumber than a fish, but that doesn’t mean that Gyorg design isn’t stupid. Then again, everything about him is terrible. I mean, his name is Gyorg. What kind of name was that? That name is so damn hard to say. Was their literally no better names Nintendo could come up with? It’s almost as if they just gave up on giving him a name. I mean they fucked up everything else in his development, so why even bother giving him a creative name. Now, there is the boss fight in the game, which is why I hate this temple so goddamn much. You have to put on the Zora Mask and swim under the water to attack him. However, that is easier said than done since Gyorg moves as fast than Sonic the fucking Hedgehog. And once he gets you, he will take off two hearts. And I had a small amount of heart containers when I reached him, so I was just begin to find some hearts before I died. Not to mention, if you try to climb back onto land, he will eat you before you know. And, once you’ve hurt him enough, he will spawn smaller fish, only to add to this awful boss fight. And, to prove I hate this boss so much, I actually gave up on this game entirely and didn’t play it for a whole year. That is how terrible this boss is. I REALLY hope they fixed this in the 3DS remake. Please, God, make the boss be better… oh, and Twinmold, Goht, and Majora too, please, But, keep Odolwa the same, he was great
So, there you go. Did you enjoy the list. Tell me what you thought. With that, I will see you all next time
#10: Jalhalla - Now, this boss fight may not have been too bad, but this was more of his design and how he acted. The Earth Temple was a great temple. It was challenging, but it was also very scary. So, I kept thinking the temples boss was going to be something scary… then I remembered that Ocarina of Time’s Shadow Temple had Bango Bango, which looks more like a mutated penis. In other words, Jalhalla was a complete disappointment. Seriously, its a giant fat ghost. Hell, he is so fat that it takes a while to get his fat ass off the ground. You can even roll him around like a bowling ball to damage him. Like I said, his boss fight wasn’t too bad, but it wasn’t too fun either. That’s why it is only #10
#9: Gohdan from Wind Waker - Now, Gohdan is said to be the most amazing piece of technology in all of the world, and was created by the gods to test Link to see if he was actually the hero of time. So, were the gods drunk when they made him, because, all I see is a trend going on here. Nintendo seems to have a habit with making bosses with a weak spot on their hands and later, somewhere on the head. And Gohdan is exactly that. Not only is he unoriginal, but, if you run out of bombs and arrows, the only things that can kill him, he gives you MORE. What kind of advanced technology helps his opponent defeat him… The temple was pretty cool though
#8: Morpheel Phase 2 from Twilight Princess - Now, people have actually said that this boss fight was cool. Mainly because he is large and can fly around… But, that’s it. He’s large and flies around. Nothing else. Now, while the first phase sucked as well, at least he attacked you. All he does in the second phase is swim around. It’s just pathetic. And people still say this is cool. You want to see something like this that is actually cool. Fight Molgera from Wind Waker. He flies, and, get this, HE ATTACKS YOU! TAKE NOTES, MORPHEEL
#7: King Dodongo from Ocarina of Time - How is it possible to make a boss weaker than the first boss. Yes, I think King Dodongo is easier than Gohma. He fires fireballs at you, which lets you throw bombs into his mouth, and he rolls around, which can also be avoided if you have the Hylian Shield, or just stand in a corner. Not to mention, if you run out of bombs, there are more just lying around. I mean come on, it’s as if King Dodongo WANTS you to kill him. Then again, if he is really this easy, I can’t blame him
#6: Twinmold from Majora’s Mask - OH, COME ON, STONE TOWER TEMPLE! You were so close to being a perfect temple. I mean SO CLOSE! And then you give us a boss like THIS! People have said that Twinmold is a fun boss, because you use the Giant’s Mask on him. But, that just makes the fight easier. All Twinmold does is fly around. In other words, Twinmold is just Morpheel, only there’s two of them. Yeah, because EVERYONE wanted two of one boring boss. This boss fight is just boring. I honestly can’t see why people like it so much
#5: Moldorm from a Link to the Past - Now, after going up the large tower, you then meet Moldorm. All he does is walk around the area. Trust me, that is much more annoying than it sounds. You need to attack the weak spot on his back. However, that is easier said than done, because with every hit he takes, he gets even faster. And, if you are not careful, he will knock you off the platform, and you will have to start the whole fight from the beginning. Grantide, there are hearts at the bottom so you can regenerate health, but that is only limited. Moldorm healing himself completely, however, is infinite
#4: The Imprisoned from Skyward Sword - Now, this is a boss you fight three times. In other words, THIS IS THE SHIT VERSION OF THE GHIRAHIM FIGHTS! The first fight, you need to hit the weak spots on his foot. This phase is tolerable. Nothing fun, but, not too bad… Phase two is where things REALLY start to get bad. You need to attack his weak spots again to make him fall, then when that’s done, you need to use the catapult as Groose to launch bombs at him to attack his weak spot. But, since it is so small and he is always moving, you will barely get a chance to hit it. Ooh, and then there’s the part where you need to get on top of his head. He will always move away from you, making landing on him near impossible. And if he flings you off, … Well, just be prepared for a long run back up to where you were. Then there’s Phase 3… It’s just like Phase 2, only he has arms now… THIS FIGHT SUCKS
#3: Angler Fish from Link’s Awakening - …… It’s a fish….. He can be killed in 5 seconds flat…….. Do I even need to go on
#2: Morpha from Ocarina of Time - Oh, god. How is it possible to fuck up this badly. You thought a fish was a stupid idea, well, how about just water. Fucking water of all things is a boss. Now, this fight can either be insanely annoying, or pathetically easy. It is annoying because Morpha has one attack, where he grabs you, squeezes you, and then flings you away. This attack can take away at least three hearts. And he will kill you if you are not a pro at Zelda. But, he is easy because, what’s you get the nucleus out, you can actually keep using the Longshot to drag him to a corner, and then trap him there and just wail at him until he dies. I actually tried this trick and defeated Morpha IN 11 SECONDS! How do you make a boss suck so bad, that the temples mini-boss was better than this. Seriously, no one at Nintendo thought that Dark Link should have been the temples boss
#1: Gyorg from Majora’s Mask - Oh dear god, not this fucking thing. Yeah, I know I said that Morpha’s design was dumber than a fish, but that doesn’t mean that Gyorg design isn’t stupid. Then again, everything about him is terrible. I mean, his name is Gyorg. What kind of name was that? That name is so damn hard to say. Was their literally no better names Nintendo could come up with? It’s almost as if they just gave up on giving him a name. I mean they fucked up everything else in his development, so why even bother giving him a creative name. Now, there is the boss fight in the game, which is why I hate this temple so goddamn much. You have to put on the Zora Mask and swim under the water to attack him. However, that is easier said than done since Gyorg moves as fast than Sonic the fucking Hedgehog. And once he gets you, he will take off two hearts. And I had a small amount of heart containers when I reached him, so I was just begin to find some hearts before I died. Not to mention, if you try to climb back onto land, he will eat you before you know. And, once you’ve hurt him enough, he will spawn smaller fish, only to add to this awful boss fight. And, to prove I hate this boss so much, I actually gave up on this game entirely and didn’t play it for a whole year. That is how terrible this boss is. I REALLY hope they fixed this in the 3DS remake. Please, God, make the boss be better… oh, and Twinmold, Goht, and Majora too, please, But, keep Odolwa the same, he was great
So, there you go. Did you enjoy the list. Tell me what you thought. With that, I will see you all next time
Now, what is one of the most laughably bad fanfics I have ever read in my entire life. Well, I think that that fanfic would be the creepypasta known as Mad for McDonalds.
Now, this story starts with a man who goes to a local McDonalds and starts eating. However, he just keeps eating, to the point where he becomes addicted to it. So addicted to where he goes there all the time, just eating Big Macs and stuff like that. Soon, his family keeps him from going back, so he gets angry and, for some reason, dresses up as Ronald McDonald and sneaks off to eat more at McDonalds only to become a great big fat fuck.
And that's about it. Like I said, this creepypasta, while not even being all that creepy, but is just so bad, that it is so hilarious. But, hey, that's only my opinion. Whats Your Take
Now, this story starts with a man who goes to a local McDonalds and starts eating. However, he just keeps eating, to the point where he becomes addicted to it. So addicted to where he goes there all the time, just eating Big Macs and stuff like that. Soon, his family keeps him from going back, so he gets angry and, for some reason, dresses up as Ronald McDonald and sneaks off to eat more at McDonalds only to become a great big fat fuck.
And that's about it. Like I said, this creepypasta, while not even being all that creepy, but is just so bad, that it is so hilarious. But, hey, that's only my opinion. Whats Your Take