Link: (Wakes up) Huh, what happened
King of Red Lions: Oh, Link, good thing your safe. After your Pokemon burned down that building, I got you out of there
Link: Huh (Sees Tetra) Holy shit, did me and Tetra-
King of Red Lions: No
Link: Goddamn it
King of Red Lions: Anyway, we need to go to the sacred realm again, because............. Well, lets go (Goes through portal)
King of Red Lions: Well, here we are
Link: (Breathes for air) Why the fuck didn't you warn me
King of Red Lions: I can't help it. I'm a boat. I don't even have lungs. Anyway, just go in there, and take Tetra
Tetra: (Wakes up) Did someone say my name
Link: Than god, I thought I'd have to carry her
Tetra: Carry me. Well, in that case (Pretends to be asleep)
Link: Son of a bitch
Link: (Carries Tetra) Oh, fuck this (Throws Tetra on ground)
Tetra: Ow. What the fuck
Link: Well, too bad
???: Ah, good, your both here
Link: Who said that
???: (Man appears) It is I, the King of Red Lions
Link: Huh. It's you
King of Red Lions: Yes. It is really me. And I'm the king of Hyrule as well
Link: So your two kings at once
King of Red Lions: Yep
Link: Wait, what's Red Lion anyway
King of Red Lions: I think its a pub
Link: Oh
King of Red Lions: Anyway, Tetra. I have a secret to tell you. You are my long lost daughter, and your real name is Zelda
Tetra: Whaaaaaat
King of Red Lions: Yes, it is true. Now, hold still while I reach into you and show you things you've never seen
Tetra: Uh... I need an adult
King of Red Lions: Oh shut up (Bright light appears) (Tetra wears princess outfit)
Tetra: Oh my god. I'm a princess
Link: (Stares)
King of Red Lions: Um.... Link...... Link..... LINK
Link: Huh, oh um..... what
King of Red Lions: Now, you and I must leave elda in this really weird place for god knows how long until we kill two more bosses
Link: Okay then
Tetra: Link, before you go. I have something to tell you
Link: Yes
Tetra: Well, I just want to tell you...... That if you fuck this up, I'll kill you
Link: Wait, what
Tetra: Bye
Link: So, King of Red Lions, what do we need to do. All I want to get this over with so I can sleep with Tetra
King of Red Lions: Hey, that's my daughter
Link: Oh right, sorry
King of Red Lions: Anyway, lets go and find the one of the two sages so we can go into the next temple.
Link: And who is the sage
King of Red Lions: Well, I don't know, but the legend says that the next sage is a human crossed with another animal that has an odd mind
Link: ................ You don't say
TO BE CONTINUED
King of Red Lions: Oh, Link, good thing your safe. After your Pokemon burned down that building, I got you out of there
Link: Huh (Sees Tetra) Holy shit, did me and Tetra-
King of Red Lions: No
Link: Goddamn it
King of Red Lions: Anyway, we need to go to the sacred realm again, because............. Well, lets go (Goes through portal)
King of Red Lions: Well, here we are
Link: (Breathes for air) Why the fuck didn't you warn me
King of Red Lions: I can't help it. I'm a boat. I don't even have lungs. Anyway, just go in there, and take Tetra
Tetra: (Wakes up) Did someone say my name
Link: Than god, I thought I'd have to carry her
Tetra: Carry me. Well, in that case (Pretends to be asleep)
Link: Son of a bitch
Link: (Carries Tetra) Oh, fuck this (Throws Tetra on ground)
Tetra: Ow. What the fuck
Link: Well, too bad
???: Ah, good, your both here
Link: Who said that
???: (Man appears) It is I, the King of Red Lions
Link: Huh. It's you
King of Red Lions: Yes. It is really me. And I'm the king of Hyrule as well
Link: So your two kings at once
King of Red Lions: Yep
Link: Wait, what's Red Lion anyway
King of Red Lions: I think its a pub
Link: Oh
King of Red Lions: Anyway, Tetra. I have a secret to tell you. You are my long lost daughter, and your real name is Zelda
Tetra: Whaaaaaat
King of Red Lions: Yes, it is true. Now, hold still while I reach into you and show you things you've never seen
Tetra: Uh... I need an adult
King of Red Lions: Oh shut up (Bright light appears) (Tetra wears princess outfit)
Tetra: Oh my god. I'm a princess
Link: (Stares)
King of Red Lions: Um.... Link...... Link..... LINK
Link: Huh, oh um..... what
King of Red Lions: Now, you and I must leave elda in this really weird place for god knows how long until we kill two more bosses
Link: Okay then
Tetra: Link, before you go. I have something to tell you
Link: Yes
Tetra: Well, I just want to tell you...... That if you fuck this up, I'll kill you
Link: Wait, what
Tetra: Bye
Link: So, King of Red Lions, what do we need to do. All I want to get this over with so I can sleep with Tetra
King of Red Lions: Hey, that's my daughter
Link: Oh right, sorry
King of Red Lions: Anyway, lets go and find the one of the two sages so we can go into the next temple.
Link: And who is the sage
King of Red Lions: Well, I don't know, but the legend says that the next sage is a human crossed with another animal that has an odd mind
Link: ................ You don't say
TO BE CONTINUED