LITTLE TONY FROM BROOKLYN ON MATH
A teacher asks her class, "If there are 5 birds sitting on a fence and you shoot one of them, how many will be left ?" She calls on little TONY.
He replies, "None, they will all fly away with the first gunshot."
The teacher replies, "The correct answer is 4, but I like your thinking."
Then little TONY says, "I have a question for YOU."
"There are 3 women sitting on a bench having ice cream: One is delicately licking the sides of the triple scoop of ice cream. The second is gobbling down the top and sucking the cone. The third is biting off the top of the ice cream. Which one is married ?"
The teacher, blushing a great deal, replied, "Well, I suppose the one that's gobbled down the top and sucked the cone."
To which Little TONY replied, "The correct answer is 'the one with the wedding ring on'," but I like your thinking."
LITTLE TONY ON MATH
Little TONY returns from school and says he got an F in arithmetic.
"Why?" asks the father.
"The teacher asked, 'How much is 2x3,' " I said "6", replies TONY.
"But that's right !" says his dad.
"Yeah, but then she asked me "How much is 3x2 ?"
"What's the f ** king difference ?" asks the father.
"That's what I said !"
LITTLE TONY ON ENGLISH
Little TONY goes to school, and the teacher says, "Today we are going to learn multi-syllable words, class. Does anybody have an example of a multi-syllable word ?"
Little TONY says, "Mas-tur-bate."
Miss Rogers smiles and says, "Wow, little TONY, that's a mouthful."
Little TONY says, "No, Miss Rogers, you're thinking of a blowjob."
LITTLE TONY ON GRAMMAR
Little TONY was sitting in class one day. All of a sudden, he needed to go to the bathroom. He yelled out, "Miss Jones, I need to take a piss !!"
The teacher replied, 'Now, TONY, that is NOT the proper word to use in this situation. The correct word you want to use is 'urinate.'
Please use the word 'ur-i-nate' in a sentence correctly, and I will allow you to go."
Little TONY, thinks for a bit, and then says, "You're an eight, but if you had bigger tits, you'd be a TEN !"
LITTLE TONY ON GRAMMAR
One day, during lessons on proper grammar, the teacher asked for a show of hands from those who could use the word "beautiful" in the same sentence twice.
First, she called on little Suzie, who responded with, "My father bought my mother a beautiful dress and she looked beautiful in it."
"Very good, Suzie," replied the teacher. She then called on little Michael.
"My mommy planned a beautiful banquet and it turned out beautifully."
She said, "Excellent, Michael !"
Then the teacher reluctantly called on little TONY.
"Last night at the dinner table, my sister told my father that she was pregnant, and he said, 'Beautiful, just f ** king beautiful !'"
LITTLE TONY ON GETTING OLDER
Little TONY was sitting on a park bench munching on one candy bar after another.
After the 6th one a man on the bench across from him said, "Son, you know eating all that candy isn't good for you. It will give you acne, rot your teeth, and make you fat."
Little TONY replied, "My grandfather lived to be 107 years old."
The man asked, "Did your grandfather eat 6 candy bars at a time ?"
Little TONY answered, "No, he minded his own f ** king business."
I LOVE Little Tony !!!!!
A teacher asks her class, "If there are 5 birds sitting on a fence and you shoot one of them, how many will be left ?" She calls on little TONY.
He replies, "None, they will all fly away with the first gunshot."
The teacher replies, "The correct answer is 4, but I like your thinking."
Then little TONY says, "I have a question for YOU."
"There are 3 women sitting on a bench having ice cream: One is delicately licking the sides of the triple scoop of ice cream. The second is gobbling down the top and sucking the cone. The third is biting off the top of the ice cream. Which one is married ?"
The teacher, blushing a great deal, replied, "Well, I suppose the one that's gobbled down the top and sucked the cone."
To which Little TONY replied, "The correct answer is 'the one with the wedding ring on'," but I like your thinking."
LITTLE TONY ON MATH
Little TONY returns from school and says he got an F in arithmetic.
"Why?" asks the father.
"The teacher asked, 'How much is 2x3,' " I said "6", replies TONY.
"But that's right !" says his dad.
"Yeah, but then she asked me "How much is 3x2 ?"
"What's the f ** king difference ?" asks the father.
"That's what I said !"
LITTLE TONY ON ENGLISH
Little TONY goes to school, and the teacher says, "Today we are going to learn multi-syllable words, class. Does anybody have an example of a multi-syllable word ?"
Little TONY says, "Mas-tur-bate."
Miss Rogers smiles and says, "Wow, little TONY, that's a mouthful."
Little TONY says, "No, Miss Rogers, you're thinking of a blowjob."
LITTLE TONY ON GRAMMAR
Little TONY was sitting in class one day. All of a sudden, he needed to go to the bathroom. He yelled out, "Miss Jones, I need to take a piss !!"
The teacher replied, 'Now, TONY, that is NOT the proper word to use in this situation. The correct word you want to use is 'urinate.'
Please use the word 'ur-i-nate' in a sentence correctly, and I will allow you to go."
Little TONY, thinks for a bit, and then says, "You're an eight, but if you had bigger tits, you'd be a TEN !"
LITTLE TONY ON GRAMMAR
One day, during lessons on proper grammar, the teacher asked for a show of hands from those who could use the word "beautiful" in the same sentence twice.
First, she called on little Suzie, who responded with, "My father bought my mother a beautiful dress and she looked beautiful in it."
"Very good, Suzie," replied the teacher. She then called on little Michael.
"My mommy planned a beautiful banquet and it turned out beautifully."
She said, "Excellent, Michael !"
Then the teacher reluctantly called on little TONY.
"Last night at the dinner table, my sister told my father that she was pregnant, and he said, 'Beautiful, just f ** king beautiful !'"
LITTLE TONY ON GETTING OLDER
Little TONY was sitting on a park bench munching on one candy bar after another.
After the 6th one a man on the bench across from him said, "Son, you know eating all that candy isn't good for you. It will give you acne, rot your teeth, and make you fat."
Little TONY replied, "My grandfather lived to be 107 years old."
The man asked, "Did your grandfather eat 6 candy bars at a time ?"
Little TONY answered, "No, he minded his own f ** king business."
I LOVE Little Tony !!!!!
Whoa, time out. Football is on.
Sorry. I was just picturing you naked.
Is there any way we can do this via e-mail?
Don't you have some laundry to do or something?
You are so cute when you get mad.
You're just upset because your bottom is beginning to spread.
Wait a minute - I get it. What time of the month is it?
You sure you don't want to consult the great Oprah on this one?
Looks like someone had an extra bowl of bitch flakes this morning!
Who are you kidding? We both know that thing ain't loaded.
Sorry. I was just picturing you naked.
Is there any way we can do this via e-mail?
Don't you have some laundry to do or something?
You are so cute when you get mad.
You're just upset because your bottom is beginning to spread.
Wait a minute - I get it. What time of the month is it?
You sure you don't want to consult the great Oprah on this one?
Looks like someone had an extra bowl of bitch flakes this morning!
Who are you kidding? We both know that thing ain't loaded.
☆go in his room and sabotoge it make it a daily thing
☆Show his gf embarrasing pics of him
☆Go into his room at night and say crazy things in his ear make it a daily thing
☆At dinner time quietly throw food but dont get caught
Bonus if its a chicken bone and it hits him in the head
☆Beat him up to make him say the weirdest stuff like my ass is fat or i stuff twinkies in my ass make it a daily thing
☆Ask dumb qs like how in da world did u get a mole dat big make it a daily thing
☆Make him do ur chores by lying on him saying stuff like Jason said that he was going to kick my ass or something like that
☆Tell him to give you a piggy back down stairs make it a daily thing
☆Sit in front of ur brother and talk on the phone act like you heard somthing suprising then do a spit take
☆Sit there and talk about nothing he carez about
By
Tayloraddict-1
Become a fan today
☆Show his gf embarrasing pics of him
☆Go into his room at night and say crazy things in his ear make it a daily thing
☆At dinner time quietly throw food but dont get caught
Bonus if its a chicken bone and it hits him in the head
☆Beat him up to make him say the weirdest stuff like my ass is fat or i stuff twinkies in my ass make it a daily thing
☆Ask dumb qs like how in da world did u get a mole dat big make it a daily thing
☆Make him do ur chores by lying on him saying stuff like Jason said that he was going to kick my ass or something like that
☆Tell him to give you a piggy back down stairs make it a daily thing
☆Sit in front of ur brother and talk on the phone act like you heard somthing suprising then do a spit take
☆Sit there and talk about nothing he carez about
By
Tayloraddict-1
Become a fan today
This is very funny I told some of my friends and they laughed.
Kids, don't try this at home XD
Oh, and anything in between these things ** Is and action.
Oh and on more thing, I live in NYC, so any references that's why.
1. Shoot me now.
2. *Jumps of Brooklyn Bridge*
3. *Sinks with the Titanic*
4. *Runs away with Prince Charming*
5. *House lands on self in Oz*
6. *Wicked witch turns self into frog*
7. *Frog gets run over*
8. *Frog gets carried away be halk*
9. *Bangs head on wall so hard, knock self into the next room*
10. *Flies into the sun*
11. *Falls off the face of the earth*
12. *Jumps off cliff*
13. *Goes skydiving and forgets parachute*
14 *Dives into shark tank*
15. *Glinda the good witch of the north send self home*
16. *Jumps into swamp full of hungry alligators*
17. Newspaper headline - "Magic trick gone wrong: teen disappears!"
18. *Swims in piranha infested waters*
19. *Runs away to Narnia*
20. *Canoes down a waterfall*
Kids, don't try this at home XD
Oh, and anything in between these things ** Is and action.
Oh and on more thing, I live in NYC, so any references that's why.
1. Shoot me now.
2. *Jumps of Brooklyn Bridge*
3. *Sinks with the Titanic*
4. *Runs away with Prince Charming*
5. *House lands on self in Oz*
6. *Wicked witch turns self into frog*
7. *Frog gets run over*
8. *Frog gets carried away be halk*
9. *Bangs head on wall so hard, knock self into the next room*
10. *Flies into the sun*
11. *Falls off the face of the earth*
12. *Jumps off cliff*
13. *Goes skydiving and forgets parachute*
14 *Dives into shark tank*
15. *Glinda the good witch of the north send self home*
16. *Jumps into swamp full of hungry alligators*
17. Newspaper headline - "Magic trick gone wrong: teen disappears!"
18. *Swims in piranha infested waters*
19. *Runs away to Narnia*
20. *Canoes down a waterfall*