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prophet69 said:
There, there.......... at least your not an ethiopian with apot belly and 15 blue bottles crawling up your nose. : -0 Okay,I'll try. When you go to a restaurant on the weekends and it's busy so they start a waiting list, theysay, "Dufrene, party of two, table ready for Dufrene, party of two." And if no one answers they'll say the name again:"Dufrene party of two." But then if no one answers, they'll move on to the next name."Bush, party of three." Yeah, but what happened to the Dufrenes!? No one seems to care! Who can eat at a time like this!? People are missing. You people are selfish. The Dufrenes are in someone's trunk right now, with duct tape over their mouths. And they're hungry. That's a double whammy. We need help."Bush, search party of three. You can eat once you find the Dufrenes."
Gentleman: A husband who steadies the stepladder so that his wife will not fall while she paints the ceiling.
Gentleman: A man who, when his wife drops her knitting, kicks it over to her so that she can easily pick it up
Houswork: What the wife does that nobody notices until she doesn't do it
Mistress: Somthing between a mister and a mattress
Megaherts: Hurts real bad!
Chicken: The only animals you eat before they are born and after they are dead
What's the best way to force aman to do sit?ups?
Put the remote control between his toes.
How many men does it take toscrew in a light bulb?
Three. One to screw in the bulb and two to listen to him brag about the screwing part.
The 10 Most Important Men in a Woman's Life:
1. The doctor because he says,"Take off your clothes"
2. The dentist because he says,"Open Wide"
3. The hairdresser because he says,"Do you want it teased or blown"
4. The milkman because he says,"Do you want it in the front or in back?"
5. The Interior Decorator because he says,"Once you have it all in, you'll love it!"
6. The banker because he says,"If you take it out too soon, you'll lose interest"
7. The police officer because he says, "Spread 'em"
8. The mailman because he always delivers his package.
9. The pilot because he takesoff fast and thenslows down.
10. The hunter because he always goes deep in the bush, shoots twice and always eats what he shoots.
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