You are having lunch with three people you respect and admire. They all start criticizing a close friend of yours, not knowing she is your friend. The criticism is distasteful and unjustified. What do you do?
Listen, nod, listen more, and defend. Make a just counter point to point out why you believe the statements they said to be flawed or only one side, and explain the other side. If that was not what I chose, then I might have to soak all this in and not say anything and then excuse myself and leave. You do not even have to mention that you know the other person in order to get your point across. It depends on whether you think you should keep their anonymity -if it's better, or to include the justification for why you have your opinion is because you know them and are their friend.
" Guy's Stop saying shit about the girl even though you know nothing about her! You don't have the right to say that about anyone!"
And they don't.
Even though they may say reason's why they do keep saying that it's wrong. And that it's not an excuse to say such crude thing's.
I mean, they shouldn't say crude thing's about anyone even though it's not your friend.
In my opinion they should keep their hatred to themselves and also find a new way of humor.
For making fun of people isn't funny.
Doesn't matter who it is.
I would stand up for that friend and definitely discourage any further negativity. It isn't fair for a person to be talked badly about without having the opportunity to defend his/herself.
Smoothly change the topic, so I am not asked my opinion, I wouldn't want to criticise my friend or tell them she/he is my friend while they are critisizing him/her.