January, 1, 2011, I know that I have skipped a lot but, trust me things are really going to get good!!! Reegan will be a year old in two weeks and I’m so excited to throw him a party. Chris and I are not married yet but, this summer for sure!!! He moved into Havenhurst with me so he can help me with Reegan. I just finished the European tour and I’m ready for a nice long break…if that’s what you want to call it. Instead of singing for thousands of fans a night now I’m dealing with bedtime stories, piggy back rides, and temper tantrums!!! I guess it’s time to get back to my crazy life!!! I woke up to Chris tossing Reegan on my stomach and said” I can’t believe he is already awake”. I pushed my Algebra textbook off the bed and Chris said” I have to leave for school soon…I wished I was home schooled”. I said” yeah but, I have to take care of the baby and do my work at the same time’!!! I kissed Chris and he left me with Reegan all day long. I walked downstairs with him on my hip and put him in his highchair. I started drinking coffee right after my tour ended because I can’t seem to stay awake long enough for Reegan to go down for a nap. I put some fruit loops on his tray and sat down so I could drink my coffee. As Reegan was trying to feed me his cereal I said” you’re so cute”. Grandma is really proud of me for being a good mom and I am always going to treat him like my son. The only thing I don’t like is that every time I look at him I see Jakes face. He has deep blue eyes and he must have gotten his hair from his biological mother because it is bleach blonde. I took him into the living room and started the Disney Cars movie. While I watched Reegan play I thought about how much my dad would love being a Grandpa. I do my best to make sure that Reegan knows who his Grandfather is. I even hung a poster of my Dad in his bedroom and say” that is you’re Papa”!!! This past year has been really hard on me but, having Reegan helps get my mind off things. Reegan walked up to me and said” Daddy, home”? I picked him up and said” no but, I wished he was”. He when over to the T.V and started to press the buttons. I said” no…don’t touch that”!!! He sat down on the floor and started to cry. I got off the couch and said” what’s wrong, I know… I’m such a mean mommy”. Every time I try to put him in his crib he just screams at the top off his lungs and I end up bringing him to our bedroom. Chris doesn’t want it to become a habit but, Reegan is my little boy!!! Chris is strict parent and I’m surprisingly the push over!!! I put Reegan in our bed and took my textbook off the floor. I fell asleep while doing my math work and when I woke up Chris was home. He said” how come he was in our bed when I walked in here earlier, I thought we agreed that would stop”? I looked at Reegan lying there sleeping with his cars pajamas on and said” how can you say no to that face Chris?” He said” fine… but, he is sleeping in his bedroom tonight”!!! I said” I guess you’re right, I don’t want him to be sleeping in our bed when he is 10 years old”!!! Later that night we watch the show super nanny to get sleep separation techniques. She had said that you are supposed to have one parent sit on the floor next to his crib and not make eye contact with him while he cry’s himself to sleep. I looked at Chris and said” I don’t know about this Chris…I hate to hear him cry and not be able to sooth him”!!! Chris said” she was saying that it could take hours for him to fall asleep; you have to be the one sitting on the floor because I have school in the morning”. I said” go tell my Grandmother that she might have a hard time sleeping tonight”!!! When it was time for Reegan to go to bed Chris kissed me and said” good luck”. I took Reegan into his room and put him in his crib. As soon as I sat down on the floor he started crying. Since he can only say two words he started saying” daddy, daddy, daddy”!!! I wanted to pick him up so badly…its times like this when I miss my dad the most. I always wonder what my dad would have done, especially now that I’m a parent. While he was screaming for Chris I felt like screaming for my dad too!!! As I sat there listening to my son cry a million thoughts raced through my mind. It felt like I was being stabbed in the heart and I started to wipe the tears off my face. After almost 4 hour Chris came to the doorway and saw the two of us crying. He walked into the room and sat on the floor next to me. He grabbed my hand and I whispered” I don’t know how much longer I can take it”. Five minutes later it started to get really quiet and looked over at Reegan. His eyes were shut and he was holding a pillow. Chris and I walked out of the room and I said” I’m so glad that is over with…it was killing me”!!! Chris said” now every night you have to move further away from his crib until you are out of the room”!!!
WEDDING AFTER SUMMER BREAK!!!
HAVE A GREAT SUMMER
I'LL BE BACK ON FANPOP IN LATE AGUST
BYE!!!!!!!
WEDDING AFTER SUMMER BREAK!!!
HAVE A GREAT SUMMER
I'LL BE BACK ON FANPOP IN LATE AGUST
BYE!!!!!!!