It was a wonderful day in Canterlot, until some ponies started panicking.
Con: What's going on?
P: Discord is back, and he's murdering more ponies!
Con: I'll stop him!
Discord: Keep it up! Everypony in this town must die!
Korean ponies: Affirmative! *kill each other*
Discord: Don't kill each other! Only kill the ones that live here.
Con: *shoots Discord*
Discord: You really think that pistol of yours will work?
Con: I shot you in the arm! Why aren't you bleeding?
Discord: Because, I'm invincible!
Con: *takes away invincibility* Not anymore.
Discord: That's it, you're screwed! Everypony, drop the nuke!
koreans: *drop nuke*
Con: Oh, fu- *wakes up* Oh thank goodness. It was only a dream.
Con's cell phone then started to ring
Con: Mane here
P: Con? Discord is back.
Con: And too bad I just woke up. *hangs up*
Fillies, and gentlecolts! I present to you the 6th Con Mane adventure, On Celestia's Secret Service
Starring
Doughnut Joe.................................Con Mane
Rarity..............................................Rareesa
Discord................... .....Ernst Staverald Discord
Pinkie Pie.............................................P
Spike....................................................S
Fenix Lighter....................................Himself
German ponies................................Good guys
Swedish & Korean ponies................Bad guys
Cars provided by
Chevronet
Coltillac
Dodge
Fillys
Flam
Flim
Laune
Con reported at P's office.
Con: I got your call, what's Discord up to now?
P: He is now trying to kill agents from various organizations.
Con: He must have a list with him.
P: He does. His first three targets are you, Fenix Lighter, and Rareesa.
Con: Really? Couldn't he kill some other pony?
P: He will, after he kills you three.
Con: *sighs* I'm on it. Should I see S before I leave?
The answer was yes.
S: Hello 0007.
Con: Hi S, what do you have for me?
S: Glad you asked, because it will blow you, and your enemies away.
Con: A missile shooting car?
S: Precisely, Chevronet Corvette with machine guns, and missiles behind the headlights.
Con: Both are behind the headlights?
S: Yes, and they pop up to, so you'll give your enemies a surprise.
Con: What about my gun?
S: A Nambu pistol, with a choice of automatic firing, or semi automatic.
Con: Nice.
S: And one more thing. Remember that pen I used to tranquilize somepony?
Con: How could I forget that?
S: I'm giving that to you. Not only is there a tranquilizer setting, but a confusion, as well as poison.
Con: Who knew words could kill?
S: I did. You'll be heading to Rareesa's home in Trottingham England, and make sure Discord does not kill her. Fenix, and some other M.I.3 agents will be there to help.
Con: Affirmative.
Con arrived at Rareesa's home.
Rareesa: Con, so glad you made it.
Con: Of course, I gotta make sure the sexiest mare in all of Equestria doesn't get killed.
Fenix: Along with me.
Con: Correction. I must make sure the sexiest mare ever, and my best friend don't die.
Fenix: Ja.
Rareesa: How long have you two known each other?
Con: Since we were colts.
Fenix: Right, and now we gotta go stop Discord.
The three ponies went for a walk toward a skiing resort. Rareesa lives in a really cool part of town, literally.
Fenix: I have some soldiers stationed by here. They'll be able to get us from here to Discord's base.
Con: Alright, in the mean time the three of us can go skiing.
Koreans: *arrive on snowmobiles*
Fenix: Or not.
Con: Go get those soldiers, we'll cover you!
korean pony62: Hello you two.
Rareesa: Hi.
korean pony62: Don't think about running, because we are getting help from sweden.
Con: You need all the help you can get to stop us. *shoots korean pony* Take his snowmobile!
Rareesa: *leaves on snowmobile*
korean pony85: Alright you two, as we planned.
Con: *skis down hill*
sweden pony24: *follows Con*
Con: *switches to automatic firing*
sweden pony52: HA! He has a small pistol!
Con: *kills sweden ponies*
korean pony85: *passes & shoots at Con*
Rareesa: Oh brilliant!
korean pony85: *shoots Rareesa*
Rareesa: *teleports behind pony*
korean pony85: What?!
Rareesa: *breaks the pony's neck*
Con: Rareesa! You ok?
Rareesa: I'm alright darling. Where are the germans?
Fenix: In helicopters!
Con: Excellent.
Fenix: Hop in, and we'll get to Discord's base.
Con & Rareesa: *Get in helicopter*
German pony35: *flies helicopter*
Con: How many ponies are here?
Fenix: 12, and they're all willing to fight alongside you.
Con: Excellent. Where is Discord's base?
german pony35: Right in front of us.
korean pony86: Intruders!
swedish pony48: It's the germans!
Fenix: Con, get on ze machine gun.
Con: *gets on MG, & shoots enemies*
swedish pony66: We need a rocket launcher!
swedish pony23: Here! *gets bazooka*
Con: *destroys bazooka*
german pony35: We have to land.
Fenix: Then do it.
All three choppers landed on the base, and all 15 ponies stormed out.
Fenix: Con, through this way!
Con: I'm right behind you.
swedish ponies: *fire at germans*
germans: *fire at swedish*
Con: *shoots enemy* Whoops! Forgot it was on automatic. *reloads*
Rareesa: I'll cover you. *shoots two enemies*
korean ponies: You swedish scum can't do anything right! *shoots germans*
german pony47: We have 4 down!
Con: *heals them* Thank god for being a unicorn.
The fighting went on for two more minutes, until Con, & Rareesa decided to CONTINUE on, while the germans would wait by the helicopters.
Con: *searches for Discord*
Rareesa: I can't find him anywhere.
Discord: *hits Rareesa*
Con: Whoa! You're not supposed to hit mares!
Discord: I don't care, I'm not a pony.
Rareesa: *hits Discord*
Discord: I have two intruders, and need back up.
swedish ponies: *run toward Discord*
Con: Rareesa, get out of here with the others. I'll handle this. *fights Discord*
swesish ponies: Hold your fire!
Con: *teleports himself & Discord on cable car*
Discord: *pushes Con*
Con: *holds onto ledge*
Discord: *grabs gun*
Con: *jams it with magic*
Discord: You goddamn unicorn. *hits horn*
Con: *climbs back up*
Discord: Stay down there! *hits Con*
Con: *grabs pistol*
Discord: *unjams gun*
Con: *shoots Discord*
Discord: *falls off cable car*
Now Con just had to escape Discord's army.
Con was stuck on the cable car, as it was heading toward some ponies that wanted him dead.
Fenix: Con! On here!
korean pony77: *shoots at helicopters*
Con: Get outta here, I have something else in mind *jumps off cable car*
Rareesa: Con!!
Con: *teleports at Rareesa's house* oh jeez.
Koreans, and swedish ponies were at Rareesa's house. They had no idea Con was there, so he got in his car, and left just when he got a phone call
Con: Hello?
P: Where are you?
Con: Making sure S's equipment doesn't get stolen. Discord is dead, but I gotta go find Rareesa.
Rareesa: *appears in Con's car* Drive as fast as you can!
Con: I gotta go *floors it*
korean ponies: *follow in other cars*
Con: What did you do?
Rareesa: The helicopters were getting shot down, and I left.
Con: You just abandoned the germans?!
Rareesa: I made them invincible for 5 minutes.
Con: Oh thank Celestia. We need to escape these ponies now!
koreans: *shoot at Con*
Con: I wanna try something *drops grenades*
koreans: *blow up*
Rareesa: So much for them.
swedish leader: But you forgot about us.
Con: *teleports into Ponyville raceway*
swedish pony56: *steals racecar*
Con: *shoots other race cars* That should block his path, and make him go into that lake.
swedish pony56: *hits other cars* No! I'm in the lake
swedish leader: great! *shoots at Con*
Con: *turns left*
Rareesa: What are you doing?
Con: Blowing him away *shoots missile*
swedish leader: AAaAAAAAAAAAAAAHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!! *dies*
Con: *teleports off race track*
Rareesa: That was cool.
Con: thanks *REPAIRS CAR*
Fenix: Rareesa! thank you for making us invincible.
Rareesa: It was the least I could do, since you were about to die.
Con: *laughs* You know Rareesa, I've been thinking..
Rareesa: What?
Con: I know we've only known each other for less then two weeks, but..
Rareesa: But what?
Con: I love you. I know I'll never find another mare like you. Will you marry me?
Rareesa: *kisses Con* You mean it?
Con: Yes.
So it was settled, Con & Rareesa got married the next day, and the two were cruising down a road in Con's Corvette.
Con: I got a week's leave, so I'll hang with you until I have to go.
Rareesa: I'm planning on joining the C.I.E.
Con: You are? What about M.I.6?
Rareesa: Forget them, you're not in it.
Con: *stops car*
Rareesa: *grabs flower* Love me
Con: I already do
Rareesa: Infuriate me.
Con: I would never!
Rareesa: In..
Con: In.. In a great honeymoon.
Rareesa: *laughs*
While the married coupled were kissing, Con was in for a surprise.
Korean mare: *driving by* Is that?
Discord: *shoots at Con*
Con: It's Discord! *gets into car* Discord.
Rareesa was killed, and Con tried to bring her back to life, but his horn was broken. Discord shot it. And 0007 swore to get revenge on the asshole that just killed his wife.
The End
Con Mane will return in Diamond Tiara's Are Forever
Con: What's going on?
P: Discord is back, and he's murdering more ponies!
Con: I'll stop him!
Discord: Keep it up! Everypony in this town must die!
Korean ponies: Affirmative! *kill each other*
Discord: Don't kill each other! Only kill the ones that live here.
Con: *shoots Discord*
Discord: You really think that pistol of yours will work?
Con: I shot you in the arm! Why aren't you bleeding?
Discord: Because, I'm invincible!
Con: *takes away invincibility* Not anymore.
Discord: That's it, you're screwed! Everypony, drop the nuke!
koreans: *drop nuke*
Con: Oh, fu- *wakes up* Oh thank goodness. It was only a dream.
Con's cell phone then started to ring
Con: Mane here
P: Con? Discord is back.
Con: And too bad I just woke up. *hangs up*
Fillies, and gentlecolts! I present to you the 6th Con Mane adventure, On Celestia's Secret Service
Starring
Doughnut Joe.................................Con Mane
Rarity..............................................Rareesa
Discord................... .....Ernst Staverald Discord
Pinkie Pie.............................................P
Spike....................................................S
Fenix Lighter....................................Himself
German ponies................................Good guys
Swedish & Korean ponies................Bad guys
Cars provided by
Chevronet
Coltillac
Dodge
Fillys
Flam
Flim
Laune
Con reported at P's office.
Con: I got your call, what's Discord up to now?
P: He is now trying to kill agents from various organizations.
Con: He must have a list with him.
P: He does. His first three targets are you, Fenix Lighter, and Rareesa.
Con: Really? Couldn't he kill some other pony?
P: He will, after he kills you three.
Con: *sighs* I'm on it. Should I see S before I leave?
The answer was yes.
S: Hello 0007.
Con: Hi S, what do you have for me?
S: Glad you asked, because it will blow you, and your enemies away.
Con: A missile shooting car?
S: Precisely, Chevronet Corvette with machine guns, and missiles behind the headlights.
Con: Both are behind the headlights?
S: Yes, and they pop up to, so you'll give your enemies a surprise.
Con: What about my gun?
S: A Nambu pistol, with a choice of automatic firing, or semi automatic.
Con: Nice.
S: And one more thing. Remember that pen I used to tranquilize somepony?
Con: How could I forget that?
S: I'm giving that to you. Not only is there a tranquilizer setting, but a confusion, as well as poison.
Con: Who knew words could kill?
S: I did. You'll be heading to Rareesa's home in Trottingham England, and make sure Discord does not kill her. Fenix, and some other M.I.3 agents will be there to help.
Con: Affirmative.
Con arrived at Rareesa's home.
Rareesa: Con, so glad you made it.
Con: Of course, I gotta make sure the sexiest mare in all of Equestria doesn't get killed.
Fenix: Along with me.
Con: Correction. I must make sure the sexiest mare ever, and my best friend don't die.
Fenix: Ja.
Rareesa: How long have you two known each other?
Con: Since we were colts.
Fenix: Right, and now we gotta go stop Discord.
The three ponies went for a walk toward a skiing resort. Rareesa lives in a really cool part of town, literally.
Fenix: I have some soldiers stationed by here. They'll be able to get us from here to Discord's base.
Con: Alright, in the mean time the three of us can go skiing.
Koreans: *arrive on snowmobiles*
Fenix: Or not.
Con: Go get those soldiers, we'll cover you!
korean pony62: Hello you two.
Rareesa: Hi.
korean pony62: Don't think about running, because we are getting help from sweden.
Con: You need all the help you can get to stop us. *shoots korean pony* Take his snowmobile!
Rareesa: *leaves on snowmobile*
korean pony85: Alright you two, as we planned.
Con: *skis down hill*
sweden pony24: *follows Con*
Con: *switches to automatic firing*
sweden pony52: HA! He has a small pistol!
Con: *kills sweden ponies*
korean pony85: *passes & shoots at Con*
Rareesa: Oh brilliant!
korean pony85: *shoots Rareesa*
Rareesa: *teleports behind pony*
korean pony85: What?!
Rareesa: *breaks the pony's neck*
Con: Rareesa! You ok?
Rareesa: I'm alright darling. Where are the germans?
Fenix: In helicopters!
Con: Excellent.
Fenix: Hop in, and we'll get to Discord's base.
Con & Rareesa: *Get in helicopter*
German pony35: *flies helicopter*
Con: How many ponies are here?
Fenix: 12, and they're all willing to fight alongside you.
Con: Excellent. Where is Discord's base?
german pony35: Right in front of us.
korean pony86: Intruders!
swedish pony48: It's the germans!
Fenix: Con, get on ze machine gun.
Con: *gets on MG, & shoots enemies*
swedish pony66: We need a rocket launcher!
swedish pony23: Here! *gets bazooka*
Con: *destroys bazooka*
german pony35: We have to land.
Fenix: Then do it.
All three choppers landed on the base, and all 15 ponies stormed out.
Fenix: Con, through this way!
Con: I'm right behind you.
swedish ponies: *fire at germans*
germans: *fire at swedish*
Con: *shoots enemy* Whoops! Forgot it was on automatic. *reloads*
Rareesa: I'll cover you. *shoots two enemies*
korean ponies: You swedish scum can't do anything right! *shoots germans*
german pony47: We have 4 down!
Con: *heals them* Thank god for being a unicorn.
The fighting went on for two more minutes, until Con, & Rareesa decided to CONTINUE on, while the germans would wait by the helicopters.
Con: *searches for Discord*
Rareesa: I can't find him anywhere.
Discord: *hits Rareesa*
Con: Whoa! You're not supposed to hit mares!
Discord: I don't care, I'm not a pony.
Rareesa: *hits Discord*
Discord: I have two intruders, and need back up.
swedish ponies: *run toward Discord*
Con: Rareesa, get out of here with the others. I'll handle this. *fights Discord*
swesish ponies: Hold your fire!
Con: *teleports himself & Discord on cable car*
Discord: *pushes Con*
Con: *holds onto ledge*
Discord: *grabs gun*
Con: *jams it with magic*
Discord: You goddamn unicorn. *hits horn*
Con: *climbs back up*
Discord: Stay down there! *hits Con*
Con: *grabs pistol*
Discord: *unjams gun*
Con: *shoots Discord*
Discord: *falls off cable car*
Now Con just had to escape Discord's army.
Con was stuck on the cable car, as it was heading toward some ponies that wanted him dead.
Fenix: Con! On here!
korean pony77: *shoots at helicopters*
Con: Get outta here, I have something else in mind *jumps off cable car*
Rareesa: Con!!
Con: *teleports at Rareesa's house* oh jeez.
Koreans, and swedish ponies were at Rareesa's house. They had no idea Con was there, so he got in his car, and left just when he got a phone call
Con: Hello?
P: Where are you?
Con: Making sure S's equipment doesn't get stolen. Discord is dead, but I gotta go find Rareesa.
Rareesa: *appears in Con's car* Drive as fast as you can!
Con: I gotta go *floors it*
korean ponies: *follow in other cars*
Con: What did you do?
Rareesa: The helicopters were getting shot down, and I left.
Con: You just abandoned the germans?!
Rareesa: I made them invincible for 5 minutes.
Con: Oh thank Celestia. We need to escape these ponies now!
koreans: *shoot at Con*
Con: I wanna try something *drops grenades*
koreans: *blow up*
Rareesa: So much for them.
swedish leader: But you forgot about us.
Con: *teleports into Ponyville raceway*
swedish pony56: *steals racecar*
Con: *shoots other race cars* That should block his path, and make him go into that lake.
swedish pony56: *hits other cars* No! I'm in the lake
swedish leader: great! *shoots at Con*
Con: *turns left*
Rareesa: What are you doing?
Con: Blowing him away *shoots missile*
swedish leader: AAaAAAAAAAAAAAAHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!! *dies*
Con: *teleports off race track*
Rareesa: That was cool.
Con: thanks *REPAIRS CAR*
Fenix: Rareesa! thank you for making us invincible.
Rareesa: It was the least I could do, since you were about to die.
Con: *laughs* You know Rareesa, I've been thinking..
Rareesa: What?
Con: I know we've only known each other for less then two weeks, but..
Rareesa: But what?
Con: I love you. I know I'll never find another mare like you. Will you marry me?
Rareesa: *kisses Con* You mean it?
Con: Yes.
So it was settled, Con & Rareesa got married the next day, and the two were cruising down a road in Con's Corvette.
Con: I got a week's leave, so I'll hang with you until I have to go.
Rareesa: I'm planning on joining the C.I.E.
Con: You are? What about M.I.6?
Rareesa: Forget them, you're not in it.
Con: *stops car*
Rareesa: *grabs flower* Love me
Con: I already do
Rareesa: Infuriate me.
Con: I would never!
Rareesa: In..
Con: In.. In a great honeymoon.
Rareesa: *laughs*
While the married coupled were kissing, Con was in for a surprise.
Korean mare: *driving by* Is that?
Discord: *shoots at Con*
Con: It's Discord! *gets into car* Discord.
Rareesa was killed, and Con tried to bring her back to life, but his horn was broken. Discord shot it. And 0007 swore to get revenge on the asshole that just killed his wife.
The End
Con Mane will return in Diamond Tiara's Are Forever
Sweetie Belle was too angry to sleep, and decided to take revenge on Rarity.
SweetieBelle plans to ruin one of Rarity's hats.
Angle on her shoulder: No! Don't do it!
Devil on shoulder: Don't lesson to that sissy. Do it!
Angle: Who you calling a sissy!
Devil: You... Sissy.
SweetieBelle: Guys this isn't helping.
Angle: Look. Look.. Rarity didn't mean it.
SweetieBelle: Wow.. Guess your right..
Angle: That's right. Now just go back to be- *literary gets shot by a gun that the devil pulls out*
SweetieBelle: OH MY GOD!
Devil: *points the tiny gun* DO IT! DO IT NOW!
SweetieBelle: *puts hands up* Okay. Okay. Take it.. Take it easy *nervously goes back to ruining the hat*
TO BE CONTAINUED
SweetieBelle plans to ruin one of Rarity's hats.
Angle on her shoulder: No! Don't do it!
Devil on shoulder: Don't lesson to that sissy. Do it!
Angle: Who you calling a sissy!
Devil: You... Sissy.
SweetieBelle: Guys this isn't helping.
Angle: Look. Look.. Rarity didn't mean it.
SweetieBelle: Wow.. Guess your right..
Angle: That's right. Now just go back to be- *literary gets shot by a gun that the devil pulls out*
SweetieBelle: OH MY GOD!
Devil: *points the tiny gun* DO IT! DO IT NOW!
SweetieBelle: *puts hands up* Okay. Okay. Take it.. Take it easy *nervously goes back to ruining the hat*
TO BE CONTAINUED
Wat:
Attempt One and Two
Don't rush, guys.
Wat:
Attempt Three
"Okay, Princess. Celestia, here are my new five friends."
"Okay, here have two tickets."
Wat:
Attempt Four
Drunk Applejack
Wat:
Attempt Five
Gilda is a bitch.
Wat:
Attempt Six
Two-parter with Trixie needs to happen.
Wat:
Attempt Seven
"There's a cloud of--"
"Shut up, Fluttershy, nobody cares about you."
Wat:
Attempt Eight
Ships.
Wat:
Attempt Nine
"Real friends don't care what your cover is."
Proof that the Mane Six (Minus Twilight) and Applebloom are not real friends.
Wat:
Attempt Ten
Nopony cares about Pinkie, either.
Wat:
Attempt Eleven
Twi, get a snowplow and bucking....
Wat:
Attempt Twelve
Recolors of Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle in the class, and Diamond Tiara is Sweetie, and Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon are bitches.
Attempt One and Two
Don't rush, guys.
Wat:
Attempt Three
"Okay, Princess. Celestia, here are my new five friends."
"Okay, here have two tickets."
Wat:
Attempt Four
Drunk Applejack
Wat:
Attempt Five
Gilda is a bitch.
Wat:
Attempt Six
Two-parter with Trixie needs to happen.
Wat:
Attempt Seven
"There's a cloud of--"
"Shut up, Fluttershy, nobody cares about you."
Wat:
Attempt Eight
Ships.
Wat:
Attempt Nine
"Real friends don't care what your cover is."
Proof that the Mane Six (Minus Twilight) and Applebloom are not real friends.
Wat:
Attempt Ten
Nopony cares about Pinkie, either.
Wat:
Attempt Eleven
Twi, get a snowplow and bucking....
Wat:
Attempt Twelve
Recolors of Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle in the class, and Diamond Tiara is Sweetie, and Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon are bitches.
"P Please let me go" Scootaloo bagged.
"Not likely. for unless we were told wrong. Your our key to Ditto" Ganger said evilly.
"No! Please don't hurt Ditto" Scootaloo cried, bagging again.
Ganger just laughed.
"You won't get away with this!" Scootaloo cried, even getting angry.
"Quite!" Ganger ordered, covering his hoof over her mouth.
But Scootaloo responded by biting his hoof.
Ganger got angered by this, but managed to control himself, he just picked her back up, before she could run off from him having dropped her in pain.
"Enough horsing around" Ganger growled.
Scootaloo just chuckled, "Horsing around". Though rather or not she REALLY thought it was funny, or was just trolling them like Sweetie Belle to Rover, is anyone's guess.
"Not likely. for unless we were told wrong. Your our key to Ditto" Ganger said evilly.
"No! Please don't hurt Ditto" Scootaloo cried, bagging again.
Ganger just laughed.
"You won't get away with this!" Scootaloo cried, even getting angry.
"Quite!" Ganger ordered, covering his hoof over her mouth.
But Scootaloo responded by biting his hoof.
Ganger got angered by this, but managed to control himself, he just picked her back up, before she could run off from him having dropped her in pain.
"Enough horsing around" Ganger growled.
Scootaloo just chuckled, "Horsing around". Though rather or not she REALLY thought it was funny, or was just trolling them like Sweetie Belle to Rover, is anyone's guess.