No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't process the thought: You are dead. For once, you will not arise. You'll never blink again. Speak again, walk again. Be with me again. The more rose color that spilled and spread across the tile floor, the more it took your life away. I didn't scream, though I wanted to to. I put my two hands together, pressed tightly on the lower half on my face. I bit so hard on my palms I believed I would begin to bleed myself. Slow, sorrowful, salty, bitter tears dribbled from my eyes. I'd stop clenching my mouth every 10 second or so to suck in a raspy breath with quivering lips to support it.
"Come back." I ordered in a whisper, to afraid to touch you. "Get up."
I shook my head back and forth slightly. Feeling that awful lead ball in my throat grow and tighten. I choked, slipping on puddles of blood. I got down on my hands and knees and weakly rested my head at your mid-stomach. "Come back.." at that point, I broke out into exclamations of sobbing. "Sebastian."