Johnny wants to talk to his teacher, so he asks her if they can exchange a few words after class. She agrees.
Teacher: “Ok, Johnny, how may I help you?”
Johnny: “I believe I’m too smart to stay in this grade. I would like to be moved directly to high school, because it’s boring here.”
She agrees one more time and notifies the principal. The principal proposes a test to prove Johnny’s intelligence and knowledge. So it begins:
Principal: “Johnny, let’s see. What is 3 x 4?”
Johnny: “12!”
Principal: “What is 6 x 6?”
Johnny: “36!”
Principal: “The capital of Japan?”
Johnny: “Tokio.”
And they continue taking this test for more than half an hour – and Johnny makes no mistakes, his answers are perfect. The principal is satisfied, but the teacher jumps in and wants to add a few questions on her own. The principal agrees.
Teacher: “Ok, let’s try some general questions. Cow has four of them, but I have two. What am I talking about?”
Johnny: “Legs.”
Teacher: “Correct. What can we find in your pants, but not in mine?”
A principal is surprised and kind of embarrassed…
Johnny: “Pockets.”
Teacher: “Correct again! Where do women have the curliest hair?”
Johnny: “In Africa!”
Teacher: “What is soft but becomes hard in women’s hands?”
Johnny: “A nail polish!”
Teacher: “What do men and women in the middle of their legs?”
Johnny: “Knees!”
Teacher: “If you compare married and single women – married woman has a wider… what?”
Johnny: “A wider bed!”
Teacher: “Which part of my body is wet most of the time?”
Johnny: “Your tongue!”
Teacher: “What starts with the letter ‘t’ and names something, that men like to watch?”
Johnny: “A (skin) tan!”
The principal is left speechless, and he decides to end this test. He turns to the Johnny, and says: “I’m not sending you to high school, but directly to college. Even I would answer all of the questions wrong!”
Teacher: “Ok, Johnny, how may I help you?”
Johnny: “I believe I’m too smart to stay in this grade. I would like to be moved directly to high school, because it’s boring here.”
She agrees one more time and notifies the principal. The principal proposes a test to prove Johnny’s intelligence and knowledge. So it begins:
Principal: “Johnny, let’s see. What is 3 x 4?”
Johnny: “12!”
Principal: “What is 6 x 6?”
Johnny: “36!”
Principal: “The capital of Japan?”
Johnny: “Tokio.”
And they continue taking this test for more than half an hour – and Johnny makes no mistakes, his answers are perfect. The principal is satisfied, but the teacher jumps in and wants to add a few questions on her own. The principal agrees.
Teacher: “Ok, let’s try some general questions. Cow has four of them, but I have two. What am I talking about?”
Johnny: “Legs.”
Teacher: “Correct. What can we find in your pants, but not in mine?”
A principal is surprised and kind of embarrassed…
Johnny: “Pockets.”
Teacher: “Correct again! Where do women have the curliest hair?”
Johnny: “In Africa!”
Teacher: “What is soft but becomes hard in women’s hands?”
Johnny: “A nail polish!”
Teacher: “What do men and women in the middle of their legs?”
Johnny: “Knees!”
Teacher: “If you compare married and single women – married woman has a wider… what?”
Johnny: “A wider bed!”
Teacher: “Which part of my body is wet most of the time?”
Johnny: “Your tongue!”
Teacher: “What starts with the letter ‘t’ and names something, that men like to watch?”
Johnny: “A (skin) tan!”
The principal is left speechless, and he decides to end this test. He turns to the Johnny, and says: “I’m not sending you to high school, but directly to college. Even I would answer all of the questions wrong!”
A bunny goes to a beach and lights a cigarette. Since he was a newbie smoker the effect was stronger than it usually is. So he was lying on a nearby rock and a goldfish came to check what’s wrong:
Goldfish: “Hey dude, are you OK?”
Bunny (slightly stoned) : “Yeah, man… Just a bit tired…”
Goldfish: “What are you doing?”
Bunny: “I got a pack of cigarettes and I lit one. It makes you kind of dizzy, but very relaxing.”
Goldfish: “Can I try?”
Bunny: “Of course! You just inhale big time, swim underwater for a while and then exhale.”
The goldfish does as told and meets a whale during swimming – so he explains the whole thing to a whale as well. A few moments later a whale comes to a bunny and wakes him up, since he dosed off. The bunny wakes up, sees the whale and screams his lungs out:
Bunny: “Goldfish, exhale, exhale!! “
Goldfish: “Hey dude, are you OK?”
Bunny (slightly stoned) : “Yeah, man… Just a bit tired…”
Goldfish: “What are you doing?”
Bunny: “I got a pack of cigarettes and I lit one. It makes you kind of dizzy, but very relaxing.”
Goldfish: “Can I try?”
Bunny: “Of course! You just inhale big time, swim underwater for a while and then exhale.”
The goldfish does as told and meets a whale during swimming – so he explains the whole thing to a whale as well. A few moments later a whale comes to a bunny and wakes him up, since he dosed off. The bunny wakes up, sees the whale and screams his lungs out:
Bunny: “Goldfish, exhale, exhale!! “
Even when you say they will
But while your off s(rewing her
My life is standing still
You tell me that you love me
When I go to leave
You tell me I'm your only one
And I let myself believe
I know that you are using me
But you'll never let me go
I know that you don't love me
I know I'm just for show
I don't know If I can stand
To see you love another girl
You know that you broke my heart
You know that your my world
But while your standing by my side
I'll believe your lies forever
Cause everything seems so perfect
When we are together
We were together for many years
We became as one.It was like
I had your blood running through my vain
We could read each other's thoughts.
Finish each others sentence without saying
a word. There is so much I'd like to change
But i cant turn back hands of time your memory
will always be apart of me and my heart.I still
talk to you and wonder if you hear. Sometimes i
feel you near even in my dreams.My heart cant say goodbye. For its afraid your memory will die
apart of my heart is with you and it's your's to
keep now that it's gone im left to stand
alone.....
We became as one.It was like
I had your blood running through my vain
We could read each other's thoughts.
Finish each others sentence without saying
a word. There is so much I'd like to change
But i cant turn back hands of time your memory
will always be apart of me and my heart.I still
talk to you and wonder if you hear. Sometimes i
feel you near even in my dreams.My heart cant say goodbye. For its afraid your memory will die
apart of my heart is with you and it's your's to
keep now that it's gone im left to stand
alone.....